We teach the child to dress without whims and unnecessary stress. How to teach a child to dress without help Why you need to teach a child to dress independently

The morning has become one of the most stressful moments of the day for me.

Firstly, because our youngest categorically does not want to get up on time (no matter what time he goes to bed).

And secondly, the children take 30-40 minutes to get dressed, and only after I stand next to them and adjust them every 2 minutes. Although I know for sure that they can easily be assembled in 10 minutes if desired. And they definitely know how to do it on their own, at least that’s what the teachers say.

This is despite the fact that our kids enjoy going to kindergarten.

To teach children to get dressed faster in the morning, I tried several methods:

1. Who gets up earlier...

We started going to bed earlier (20.30), so I started waking them up earlier (6.30). Children had more time to dress themselves. But for me it turned out to be more difficult than for them.

In order to wake up the children early, I also needed to get up early and prepare the necessary things, breakfast for my husband and get ready myself (and I really like to sleep).

And if the kids have already woken up, and I’m still doing other things, then they still won’t start getting ready, but will wait for me to finish.

That's why it wasn't our option. Although we still went to bed earlier (20.30), we left getting up in the same place (7.00).

2. The “carrot and stick” method

My husband and I also decided to try this method. But morning punishments only led to endless tears and added a certain drive to the process of getting ready for kindergarten. After trying it once, we decided to abandon this method and still start the day more positively.

Read also: Do I need to take my children to kindergarten?

“Gingerbread” also didn’t work very well. Our children love different sweets, and one candy cannot please everyone. And we didn’t always have “sweets” at home in the morning. Besides, it’s not very right to start the morning with something tasty! That is why this method was not useful to us.

3. “Who is faster”

At first glance, this is an ideal way. Whoever is faster is the best. Children love to be praised and are ready to do a lot for this (even quickly getting dressed for the street in winter).

But for our weather, this method was absolutely not suitable. Both have a very developed spirit of competition (thanks to kindergarten). And the most important thing in a competition is victory (and not participation, as many thought).

So, if one of the children was faster (and this, as you understand, is inevitable), the loser would certainly start crying. So much so that I had to undress again and do everything so that this time he would win.

As it turned out, this method did not speed up the dressing process in any way, but on the contrary, it at least doubled it.

4. "Hint"

This is exactly the method we are using now. The idea, in general, is not new and I think many mothers use it.

I noticed that Alina often doesn’t know what to wear next, so she stops or constantly asks. And in winter it is quite difficult for children to remember what goes for what. And often kids get confused and refuse to dress themselves (so as not to make a mistake).

I made a “Hint” for my little ones – what to wear in winter! And the children began to play it with great interest. The “hint” is made on a regular A4 sheet, on which items of clothing are very schematically drawn in the required sequence, connected by arrows.

How to deal with the wisdom of dressing so that children do not interfere with the actions of their parents, or even learn to dress on their own?

Sometimes the process of getting dressed turns into a real battle. The child is spinning, twisting, acting up, trying to sneak away. How can you learn to get along with this process?

The child does not want to get dressed: what is the reason?

The process of dressing seems quite boring and tiring to the child. Small children are constantly in motion - bending, twisting, refusing to follow directions. Their interest quickly switches, they want to move and learn new things.

It’s easier to do this with little ones - put a bright toy next to it, and then hand it to the baby. A bright object will attract your baby's attention while you change the diaper. You can talk, sing, make unusual sounds, keeping your baby's attention.

Try not to make a problem out of the topic of getting dressed. As a child grows, his progress periodically gives way to regression. Support your child's desire to act and remember that by the age of 5-6 he will be able to cope on his own.

How to teach a child to dress: solution

The older a child gets, the more he can take on during the dressing process. Learning to undress is easier for a child than to get dressed. Therefore, it is worth trying to master this skill first.

The most difficult thing is to learn how to fasten buttons, zippers, and fasteners. It's better to train when you have enough time. Pay attention to individual operations, show how to beat the buttons, and the child will start dressing himself with pleasure.

You will be surprised when a child who dresses independently suddenly begins to hesitate, hang around and refuse: “I don’t want to,” “Mommy, dress me.” This happens when an interesting activity suddenly turns into routine, becomes tedious and boring. You can force it - and turn the game into an obligation.

Or you can meet halfway. If he's tired, cranky, or just wants you to take care of him. “Okay, let's play little. I’ll dress you and tell you how to do it right.” Or distribute tasks. Take the most difficult thing for yourself - a shirt and buttons, and ask your child to “beat” the shoes. Remember - the game returns interest and desire to act.

And a few more clever finds for parents:

  • Teach your child that there is a clear dressing algorithm. Draw a sequence with your child and teach him to refer to this drawing while getting dressed.
  • Encourage your child to independently choose things for today's walk (from those that you consider appropriate). This will interest him.
  • Buy things that are easy to put on.
  • Turn the process into a game: “Now let’s dive into the sweater, close your eyes and hold your breath...”
  • Turn the process into a competition: “Hurry, we need to get dressed faster than dad!” Hurry up, he’s already buttoning his shirt...”, “Can we get dressed while dad counts to 10?”
  • Use a “bridge to the future” (forecasting, pointing to a “bright future”) as a method of persuasion: “We need to get dressed quickly to go to the park/slide/toy store.”
  • To bypass the child’s resistance, use the “choice-without-choice” technique: “What will you put on first - socks or a shirt?”, “Do you want to dress standing or lying down?”

When purchasing clothes, make sure that your child can put them on independently. Use pants and skirts with elastic, wide T-shirts and dresses, and easy-to-put on Velcro shoes.

However, as your child gets older, you may want to buy things with zippers. Do this when you see that the child has mastered this type of clasp and needs additional training.

  1. Closet organization.

Select lower shelves for children's clothing that the child can easily reach, or make a crossbar on which clothes can hang at the child's height.

  1. Child's choice of clothes.

Children should choose what they want to wear. But for young children, choosing from so many clothes can be difficult. Therefore, give your child a choice of just a few options: choose 2-3 pairs of trousers, T-shirts or other clothes suitable for the weather, and place them on the children's shelves. You can comment on the options: “Do you want to wear a skirt or pants? Red or blue T-shirt?

  1. We choose clothes in advance.

If your child needs to quickly get ready in the morning (for example, to go to the garden), you can prepare clothes with your baby in the evening and put them in a box or basket. You can say the child’s choice again in the morning: “Yesterday you put blue jeans and a white T-shirt in the basket...”.

  1. We teach how to dress.

Show how to put things on. Sometimes something that seems so simple and obvious to parents can cause great difficulties for a child. Therefore, show slowly how to put on this or that item of clothing, as if breaking up your actions. When your child tries to dress himself, do not rush or correct him.

If your baby asks for help or is noticeably nervous and unable to cope, be sure to help him.

  1. Selection of outerwear and accessories according to the weather.

To make it easier for your child to dress himself, it is better to put street clothes in a visible place. Choose only clothes that are appropriate for the season. Make a hook for your baby's jacket so he can hang it in place himself. Place the boots in a certain place so that the baby can always find them himself and return them to their place. It is also better to put hats and scarves (suitable for the season) in an accessible place, for example, in a small basket. Children love to use an umbrella in the rain, just like adults do. Do not deny them this opportunity; teach them to dry it upon returning from the street in the same way as is customary at your home.

Go to the window in the morning and see what the weather is like: maybe today is warmer than usual and you can go for a walk without a hat. Or it's raining and you need an umbrella. Teach older children to watch the weather forecast the way you do.

  1. We learn to put on a jacket.

In Montessori groups you can often see this trick, which greatly simplifies the process of dressing for children and surprises people unfamiliar with it. So, a child can put on a jacket as early as one and a half years old.

The child puts the jacket on the floor, with the hood facing him, inserts his hands into the sleeves and throws them over his head. So the jacket is put on without the help of adults!

  1. Learning to put on shoes.

Just like your clothes, choose simple shoes. Usually the first thing babies try to do after one year is to put on their own shoes. Therefore, the first shoes should be put on very simply and be without fasteners or with Velcro. Place a chair near the entrance, invite the child to sit down and calmly, without rushing, put on his shoes. It should be noted that in Montessori groups, children who put a shoe on the wrong foot are not corrected. Children quickly notice that they are uncomfortable and learn to put on their shoes correctly.

  1. Mutual assistance in dressing.

Children in a Montessori group usually help each other while getting dressed. Therefore, if you have several children, invite the elders to help the kids. Surprisingly, children often understand older children's explanations better than their parents'.

  1. Self-care of clothes and shoes.

After the walk, invite your child to inspect his clothes and shoes. Shoes should be cleaned or washed if necessary. Possible stains on outerwear too. Give your child the opportunity to do this on their own. Teach your child to inspect clothes in the evening and put dirty ones in the laundry basket, and put clean ones back in the closet.

Every mother sooner or later faces the question of how to teach her child to dress himself. Most often this happens when it’s time to send the baby to kindergarten. Maternity leave is coming to an end. It's time for mom to go to work. This means that every morning you need to wake up the baby and get him ready for the garden, and still have time to get ready yourself. If previously a mother could spend a lot of time dressing her child, now she can’t. He must learn to get ready for kindergarten himself, and quickly. You can’t be late for kindergarten, much less for work. The skill of dressing independently is taught to a child at the age of 2–3 years.

At some point in a child's life, he needs to learn how to dress himself. This skill will come in handy when the baby goes to kindergarten and there is no caring mother nearby.

Dressing skills for children of different ages

Each new skill does not develop in the baby immediately, but gradually. There is no need to force things. Dr. Maria Montessori believes that a child should be helped to independently acquire a new skill. This way it will be firmly established and for a long time. All that is required from adults is kind encouragement and support.

The baby begins to gradually master independent dressing by the age of 12 months. He takes off his socks and woolen cap. Praise him, and next time consciously wait until he takes off these items of clothing himself. At two years old, the child will try to put on socks and a hat on his own. Let the hat be put on a little askew, you can always straighten it. At this age, a little man can already take off his leggings, tights and panties on his own. By the age of 3, the range of his skills expands. He can be taught:

  • put on and take off panties and warm pants with elastic;
  • wear a vest without buttons, a hat, socks;
  • wear shoes without laces or fasteners;
  • take off your unbuttoned shirt or blouse;
  • fasten the zipper already threaded into the base on the clothing and unfasten it.


By the age of one year, babies begin to undress themselves or undress others.

By the age of 4, skills increase. The child can:

  • put on a T-shirt and sweater;
  • wear leggings or trousers;
  • fasten buttons on clothes;
  • undress yourself.

It is better for a child to demonstrate all these skills under the supervision of an adult, so that he can help if something is put on inside out or backwards. Older children, shortly before entering school, can get dressed and undressed without parental supervision. Parents achieve this by gradually teaching their child to be independent from an early age.

From simple to complex - the most correct way of learning

When a child has just learned to walk, an unknown world of interesting objects in the apartment opens up to him. Let him take and examine things, try them on. Only objects that are dangerous from the traumatic side need to be removed from his eyes. The main thing is that the baby is under the supervision of elders.

Voice your actions while getting dressed. Say: “one pen in the sleeve, another pen in the other sleeve. Give me a leg, let’s put a shoe on it.” If you explain your actions all the time, your baby will understand you better. The next time you get dressed, he himself will hold out your arms and legs. At about 18 months, the child will try to take off his own socks. Rising from the potty, he will try to pull up his pants on his own. Take your time, give him the opportunity to prove himself. If the action works, praise it. Even if the pants are a little askew, it can always be fixed. Try not to do for your child what he can do for himself, and do not be stingy with praise.



Fun games will help teach your child how to dress faster, as they will make the process interesting and entertaining.

A two-year-old baby tries to put on underpants, tights, and pants on his own. Try to keep your clothes loose and comfortable enough to put on. Wide pants are easier to put on than tights. You can help the little man a little. To motivate him to action, you can pull the tights on him not all the way. He will try to pull them up himself. If you can only guide your baby along the right path, and not carry out the dressing steps for him, he will quickly learn to dress himself.

A more difficult stage is putting on T-shirts and sweaters. If your baby's clothes are too tight, he will get stuck in them when getting dressed and get angry. This will negatively affect his enthusiasm, and he will lose interest in the process. Buy clothes a size larger for your little one so that he can put them on easily. The neck of T-shirts and sweaters should be free. Do not wear turtlenecks or other tight-fitting clothing.

We take into account the child’s opinion

We must not forget about the quality of clothing. It should not only be free, but also comfortable. Check that the sweater does not bite. Wool should be natural, soft and pleasant to the body. It is better to choose cotton T-shirts. We must also take into account the taste of the child. If he categorically does not like the thing, he should not insist on using it.



All children, and especially young fashionistas, like to choose their own clothes. Encourage it and tell them if something is wrong

Many children by the age of three are able to dress themselves, from underwear to outerwear. Think over your baby's outfit so that he doesn't have to sweat over complicated fasteners. If a child puts something on backwards or mixes up his shoes, do not scold him. Help me take off something and change clothes. You can fasten the fasteners yourself when the rest is already put on.

Praise your child, your good mood and goodwill will help him maintain interest in dressing, and reproaches will kill the initiative in the bud. If you don't have time for work, next time start getting ready 30 minutes earlier.

If the baby can’t cope with dressing himself, help him a little so that he doesn’t start getting angry and loses interest in the process. Don't get annoyed or laugh at your baby. He doesn't do everything perfectly, but what he does is worthy of your pride. Forget about your perfectionism.

Teaching Techniques

Adults do not think about the process of dressing, doing everything mechanically. This system is not suitable for a child. To teach him to put on clothes correctly, examine them together with him from all sides. Show him where the heel is on the sock, where the seams are on the tights, where the front and back of the sweater are, where the back is, and where the face is. Show how to place the item in front of you to put it on correctly.


It is difficult for a child to immediately remember how to put on all things correctly, so the mother needs to explain how to do it correctly

Explain to your child the sequence of putting on clothes and how to put on each specific item. Have you ever wondered how to put on a sweater, first the sleeves, then the neck, or vice versa? How to put on trousers, first sitting, and then standing when your feet come out of the trousers? Where is the front of the sweater and where is the back, and how to determine this? Is the neckline worn over the face or over the top of the head? Now all this will have to be justified and explained.

Sometimes it doesn't hurt to use a little trickery. If you missed the moment for teaching, and the child is used to being dressed by his parents, and does not want to dress himself, try turning dressing into a fun game:

  1. Let the legs be trains, and the trouser legs be tunnels through which you need to drive.
  2. Have a dress-up competition. The baby must win these competitions.
  3. “Forget” how to dress properly. Wear tights on your head and socks on your hands. Let your child correct you.
  4. Play with hands and feet. Let them say: “I’m cold, where can I warm myself?” or “Oh, how scary, I want to go to the house.”

If you skillfully organize motivation, the child will be happy to start dressing himself. Try to help your baby.



By preparing a clothing cheat sheet for your child, you will help him build the correct dressing order.

As practice has shown, it is much easier for a baby to undress himself than to dress. Start by undressing - let your one-year-old baby take off his socks and hat. If something doesn't work out for him, help him a little, but not completely, so that he completes the process himself. Let your child learn to cope with difficulties. Don't forget to praise him.

A person may become overwhelmed by the amount of clothing that needs to be put on. It makes sense to divide clothes into 2 parts - the one that the baby puts on, and the one that the mother puts on him (we recommend reading:). As you learn, transfer one item at a time from your section of clothing to your baby. Do this until the child can dress himself.

To remember the order of putting on clothes, you can make a poster - a cheat sheet. Draw items of clothing on it in the order in which they should be worn. When getting dressed, help your child put his clothes in the right order. Let your child check if you have laid everything out correctly.

For dressing in the morning before kindergarten, prepare clothes for your preschooler in the evening. Lay it out in the order in which it will be worn on a chair or somewhere else where it will not disturb anyone.

To help your child remember where the front is, buy blouses and trousers with pockets and bright prints on the front. If the item is one color, do embroidery or appliqué on it. They will not ruin a single-color T-shirt, sweater or dress.



By teaching your child to dress independently at a young age, you prepare him for quickly getting ready for school.

Little tricks

Make a compromise when your child is ready to act up. If he wants to wear a yellow sweater rather than a blue one, don't stop him. Replacing a skirt with trousers or a sundress can prevent a scandal. When a child does not want to dress himself, he may not have had enough sleep or is not feeling well. Agree that you will help him - you will wear the right sleeve and right leg, and he will wear the left side.

Choose clothes together with your baby. Go shopping together. Go through the contents of the closet together. Ask the little man what he wants to wear to kindergarten. If his choice is unsuccessful, explain why you object - the clothes are not suitable for this weather, the colors do not go together.

Praise your child often. My son put on his pants himself - well done. My daughter put on her shoes on her own – great. A child putting on a sweater backwards is an achievement. You can change it later. Praise will help your baby learn to dress himself much better than reproach.


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