From friendship to love or how to find a faithful companion in life? How to transfer relationships from friendship to love: advice from psychologists The girl turned the relationship into friendship.

Love stories that begin with friendship are often the longest. If you have a friend that you begin to develop feelings for, it may scare and confuse you. Chances are you don't want to jeopardize a friendship, but you also don't want to miss out on something good. However, if you change your habits, openly admit your feelings, and start acting more romantically, you can turn friendship into love.

Steps

Part 1

Rate your feelings. Before deciding to be romantically involved with a friend, think critically and carefully about why you like them and why you want your relationship to change. Remember, as soon as you confess to a person your sympathy, your friendship will change forever.

• For example, if you only want to date him because you feel good around him, that's probably not the best reason to pursue a relationship.
• However, if your heart skips a beat when you see him, or if you get jealous when he dates other people, you may need to analyze your feelings.

1. Talk to someone you trust. Before confessing your feelings to a friend, seek advice from someone you trust, such as another friend or a parent. Most likely, these people have experienced something similar in their lives and will be able to give you good advice and valuable information on how to deal with feelings.

   • Mutual friends can be especially helpful because they know both of you and they can provide a more objective perspective.

2. Flirt a little with him. Although you may not be able to jump right into a romantic relationship, you can start setting the tone for your desires. Flirt lightly with your friend from time to time. Assess his reaction to flirting, and if he responds positively or starts flirting in return, this is a sign that he is also interested in you.

   Make subtle hints. You can start occasionally dropping hints about how to deepen your relationship. This is another way to gauge his interest in you, which will either spur him on or keep him from going too far.

   • You can say something like, “My mom asked last night if we were dating. I told her not yet." The person will be intrigued by your answer, and their reaction will help you determine how they feel.

3. Try to look good when you spend time together. Strive to look your best. Make sure you look clean and well-groomed and that you are well dressed. If you know that a person likes a certain color or smell, try to wear that shade or use that scent more often. Even though a relationship is much more than an outer shell, the initial attraction is important for sparking. If you look your best, the person is more likely to notice you and look at you in a new light.

   Compliment him more often. This is a great way to let the person know that you like them without telling them directly. Most people love to receive compliments, and your friend is most likely no exception. If one day he looks particularly attractive, let him know. If he does well on a school project or work assignment, let him know that you admire his intelligence and professional discipline.

   • However, do not overdo it with compliments. The abundance of flattering words sometimes entails a negative effect. Try to praise him once or twice daily for some time.

4. Work on your body language. Flirting and expressing affection for a person is much more than just words. We also express feelings with our bodies. Use body language to make gestures that signal your attraction.

   • Lean slightly towards the person when they are talking.
   • Gently look into his eyes when he speaks.
   • Smile widely when you see him or when he says something nice.
   • Laugh at his jokes.
   • Touch him lightly and unobtrusively. Put your hand on his shoulder when you laugh at his joke, or quickly touch his knee when you sit next to him and chat.
   • You can also hug a friend at a meeting and goodbye.

   Part 2

   State your feelings

   1. Collect your thoughts. Once you've taken the first steps to demonstrate your liking, plan your speech. Be sure to tell him that you appreciate his friendship but see the potential for something new and different. Despite the possible positive reaction, be prepared for the fact that he probably just wants to be friends, and this is also normal.

      • You may be better able to organize your thoughts if you write them down.

   2. Think before you speak. Your friendship will change forever after this moment, whether you date or not. Take some time to yourself and think critically about your decision before continuing.

   3. • Meet in a quiet place that you both like, like a park or a coffee shop.
      • If the thought of meeting scares you, you can talk on the phone. This way you both feel less pressure.
      • If you feel too tense even when talking on the phone, consider expressing your thoughts in a letter.

   4. Be honest and sincere. This is a good time to let a friend know about your true feelings. Perhaps he is experiencing the same thing as you, but was too afraid to admit it. Open your heart to him and tell him how much you love being friends with him, but that there's nothing you can do about your romantic feelings for him.

      • You can start with something like, “We've been friends for a while now and I've enjoyed every minute of this friendship. In fact, I enjoy it so much that I noticed that I often think about you and look forward to spending time together. I would like you to know that I like you for more than just a friend. And if my feelings are not mutual, this, of course, will upset me, but I will understand everything. I can't keep it to myself anymore without knowing if you feel the same way."

   5. Listen. After you have expressed your feelings to your friend in a way that is as honest and open as possible, take some time to listen to their response. Listen to him carefully, without thinking about the answer at the same time, but just try to understand it. Even though this is an exciting situation and you will probably be very nervous, try to concentrate as much as possible.

      • You might want to say something like, "Well, I've said quite a lot, and I'd like to know what you think right now. Please be honest with me."
      • Answer any questions your friend may have. He may ask when you felt something more, so take the time to think about your answer beforehand.

   6. Give the person time to think. Perhaps you will shock him with your words, or maybe he knew this would happen. Either way, this is a lot of information to take in, so be respectful of your friend and give them time to think things through. Tell him you don't expect an immediate response if he doesn't provide one on the spot.

      • If your feelings are mutual, great! If not, that's fine too, because life goes on.

   Part 3

   Inject romance into friendship

   1. Start slowly. Don't jump into a relationship right away. This tends to get in the way of building long-term and meaningful partnerships. Better take your time to get to know the person in a new, different light.

      • Now that your relationship has gone beyond friendship, things will be different. Enjoy it, but be patient. Don't rush and don't rush to love.

   2. Start spending more time alone. If you usually see each other in a company or among mutual friends, start carving out time to be alone more. Relationships often deepen and develop when nurtured apart from other interactions.

      • However, don't leave your friends for a newfound relationship. Keep in touch with them, just take the time to be alone with your new soul mate as well.
   • Just act naturally and unobtrusively, because if you suddenly change your behavior suddenly, you can scare a person. He likes you for who you are, so don't pretend to be someone else.
   • Do not show off in front of him, but rather try to ask for help with things like homework, fixing something, and more.
   • Note that most relationships start out as friendships.
   • Be yourself!
   • Compliment him often.
   • You can sometimes call him for a walk to see his reaction.
   • He may want more from you. When demonstrating your love for a person, never make him doubt your feelings.

   Warnings

   • Don't push too hard.
   • You can't force someone to experience something they don't feel.
   • Don't get obsessed.
   • Make sure he doesn't already have a partner.
   • Change your behavior subtly and in small increments.
   • Don't stare at him or make him feel uncomfortable.
   • Remember that many people are afraid of losing a good friendship, so don't rush things. If he still feels uncomfortable about the situation, don't pressure him. Maybe it's better to be friends.

The likelihood of a strong feeling for a man who is an old and close friend is quite high. Perhaps this man was not only a good conversationalist and listener, but also literally personified a brother. But a turning point came in your life when you realized that you will never meet a more wonderful person who is able to make you happy.

He always enters into your position, he is there when you just want to cry without significant reasons for this, he is the best, kind, understanding and caring. And the question spontaneously arises in your head: why did I not pay attention to him as the man of my dreams before?
Is there an objective possibility to translate the position of friendship into the status of love?

In order to attract the attention of your friend and get him to take a step back, you need to prove that you are really in love and have sincere feelings for him.

Compared to other women, you have a lot of advantages, because you have the knowledge of all the pros and cons of a man who cares about you. You know what he prefers and likes. In this regard, if you apply all the accumulated information wisely and connect all your charm to it, then you can turn friendship into love without spending much effort.
You must win his love! Try to ask him questions about past relationships as often as possible. At the same time, anger and jealousy may arise in your soul, but you must restrain yourself and not show these emotions, because your goal is to transfer the relationship from a state of friendship to love. And if negative emotions do arise, then you must remember that the previous girls are left behind, and only you are currently with him.

In the event that you are absolutely sure that a man is emotionally ready to create a serious relationship (you may not necessarily be a candidate), then you can confidently ask questions.
First of all, you should be interested in what attracted a young man in an ex-girlfriend, what he appreciated in her and what actions he was ready for for her. Remembering these disturbing moments, he automatically projects this ideal image and positive emotions onto you. Only you are completely different, you are a charming woman who can give him a sea of ​​​​new and unexplored feelings. Having received answers to the necessary questions, you will be able to choose the right key to his heart.
You have always seen in him a very close person, but as soon as love appears in your heart, a woman will wake up in you. You will want to see him more often, and when you meet you will be flirtatious. This is all great, but you must remember that your goal is different, and such behavior on your part can only scare and repel him.

The process of transferring relationships from friendship to love is not a difficult stage. But, before embarking on this mission, think about the question: “If you can achieve this man, will your feeling of love disappear?”. The answer to this question is very important, because returning the former friendship is much more difficult than achieving love and reciprocity.

Provided that you are sure that you made the right decision and you will never regret that you tied your fate with a friend, then your union will be filled with many positive moments.
Of course, love characterizes the presence of attraction to each other, as well as mutual passion. But, after a while, you will cross this period of insanity. And what will you have left? And this is where your past friendships will come into play. You will remember that you are very emotionally close, you always spoke on interesting topics, there was complete trust between you and at that time a friend, more than once came to your aid at the first call.
Therefore, everything that was said above is the true guarantee of a strong, happy and long relationship!

1. Refuse to play the wrong role in his life.. So, he likes to tell you about relationship problems with other girls. Do you think this is a plus, because he trusts you, and with your advice you have a big influence on his life?

But no! This means that he has given you a certain place among his acquaintances - the place of "best friend". And the best friend is not invited on dates and does not kiss passionately on the lips.

Also avoid the role of "little sister", which he takes care of, and "mother", who constantly takes care of him.

2. Find out what your loved one is looking for in a romantic relationship. You think that friendship is the basis of love, and a boyfriend for you is a friend with whom you have sex. But your chosen one may think differently. Make him open up a little and tell how he sees his future girlfriend and relationship with her. Do you fit that description exactly? Then bolder into battle!

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3. Make them treat you like a girl. If you have known each other for a long time, and especially if you belong to his stable and predominantly male company, it is likely that he simply does not consider you as a creature of the opposite sex.

What to do? First, pay attention to your appearance. Jeans and sneakers are comfortable, but too unisex, and you need to stand out. Secondly, do not allow rude behavior in your presence: curses, vulgar jokes, beer burps. Thirdly, avoid 100% male entertainment, better join the party during gender-neutral trips to the movies or
at parties.

4. Touch it. But it has to be done right. We all touch friends and loved ones in different ways. Refuse friendly pushes and pats on the back and do not let him touch you like that. Your targets: his hair, face, palms, knees, shoulders. And don't expect him to touch you first, be bolder!

5. Try to arrange a "not date". Of course, you want to be alone with him in a dark cinema hall or in a restaurant. But such an invitation will immediately tell a lot about your intentions, and if the guy is not ready yet, all your efforts will be wasted. Therefore, ask to keep you company in the things that you still need to do: go somewhere, pick up something, buy something. A great opportunity to be together and become a little closer.

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6. Your move! If you do everything right, over time, your communication will become more intense, flirting - more and more frank, touching - more and more intimate.

If you feel that the time has come, you can try to talk about your feelings. It is not necessary only to make an event out of this. Just wait until you are alone and tell him how much you appreciate your friendship. And add that you'd like to take the relationship to the next level.

7. Try not to do these things:

Do not rush things;

Don't try to ruin his relationship with another girl;

Don't get obsessed;

Don't give up friendship if he doesn't want a romantic relationship.

And, of course, about the personal. If your plans do not yet have children, do not forget to think about contraception in time.
Non-hormonal suppositories

Question to the psychologist:

Good afternoon, dear psychologists and site visitors!

My name is Natalia, I am 32 years old, I am raising two children from my first marriage alone. Divorced for 1.5 years. Working.

My story is this... Seven months ago, a man (46 years old) came to work with me for his professional interests. We struck up a conversation and exchanged contacts. From our first communication, it became clear to me that he liked me outwardly, and as a professional in my field. He, in turn, at first glance did not make a special impression on me as a man, but he was very interested as a person. My conjectures were confirmed, and he began to look for reasons to meet. At first it was working moments, but then, when we started to get to know each other better, it turned out that we have a lot in common. His personal qualities, life achievements, professionalism, intelligence, sense of humor, charisma, perseverance, tirelessness, devotion to word and deed, led and continue to delight me. Communication takes place every day on the Internet, sometimes for several hours before bedtime. We meet once, sometimes two or three times a week. Most of the meetings take place at my work, sometimes we go to lunch in a cafe. During our meetings there is chemistry. We constantly look into each other's eyes (sometimes for 15-20 seconds in silence), laugh, both are looking for reasons to touch, hug each other, kiss (on the cheek), both feel and understand each other, chat on all topics ... other than personal relationships. I feel his care, attention, concern for me. He tells me a lot of his secrets and ideas, trusts me. He receives from me

support in business, his sports passion, approval of everything he does, admiration, compliments, attention to his life. He never puts me in an awkward position, always adapts to my conversation. Despite the fact that he has a lot of life experience behind him, he is more intelligent than me, he is interesting and fun with me, calmly. Even if I sometimes say stupid things, he will translate everything into a joke. And even if we are thousands of kilometers apart (due to mine and his business trips), I feel that he is next to me. We share photos of everything that happens around, photos of each other.

He is a very busy man, working 20 hours a day, 7 days a week. This is 100% fact. Never stands still. Everything seems to be fine, and our "friendly" relationship looks like a protracted prelude to a deeper love, but! Once, at the very beginning of our acquaintance, he uttered the following phrase in a conversation: "Sometimes you need to take a break from your family!" It doesn't matter in what context it was said. After that, about the family, and most importantly about the wife, there was no talk at all. And he behaves as if he is an absolutely lonely, ascetic person. But I remember those words, and it seems to me that "there" is someone there. And how can I be in this situation? How to break it? I can't understand what he feels for me and why he doesn't take any steps. It is as if we are walking on an invisible line, crossing which is our taboo outside of the vowel. I really value this person, and I can say with 100% certainty that I love him. Sometimes I want to interrupt everything, cut the bridges completely, so as not to think about him. Because it's hard to be friends with him. I don't have the courage to admit it myself. Ask about personal - too. I understand that I need to take some steps myself. But which way? So while I'm waiting for it to show itself. But little by little my thoughts are driving me crazy. All I want is for us to be together. It doesn't matter how long. I just want to be with him as a friend, and as a woman.

The psychologist answers the question.

Hello, Natalia. It is felt from your letter that you fell deeply in love and emotionally attached to this man. You are asking for advice on what to do. I have no right to give you advice, but I can give you information as a specialist psychologist, and then you can decide for yourself how to use it.

I can tell you for sure that by remaining in the dark about your relationship with him and whether he has a family and further, you will become more and more attached to him and more and more mentally "be with him." This happens because in reality you are not doing anything to remove the unknown and clarify for yourself whether it is possible to get what you want - the development of your relationship in the direction of love. Therefore, your psyche compensates for this in such a way - inventing a fantastic reality in your head, where it creates what you want - you are almost all the time thinking about it - and therefore, as it were (!) And with it. This almost always leads to emotional exhaustion and even some kind of anger, because after a while you will really miss what you get in reality. Your fantasies will go very far, and reality will be much more separated from them. And this causes irritation and anger.

Most likely, a man will begin to feel it and start to freeze, even if you continue to keep everything in yourself. Because reality developed differently for him than it did for you. It is possible, of course, that the man, as you hope, will clarify the relationship with you. But if he hasn't done it yet, it means he's fine as it is. Are you ready to wait and then it is not known how long, until what he receives from you now is not enough for him? What if that moment never comes? Are you ready to sacrifice yourself and your developed feelings for the sake of his desires and needs? If the inner voice answers you “yes” or even “yes for now”, then you are already in a state of emotional dependence on it, and this is a state of strong psychological maladjustment and it definitely does not benefit either you or your relationship. If you do nothing, most likely, the man will soon become "stuffy" with you in a relationship and he will stop them, and you will be very hurt. In this case, I advise you to think about contacting a psychologist in order to get out of addiction and continue this relationship with a different message to a man. Fortunately, our site has a large selection of good specialists. You can also contact me - I will be glad to help you!

Girls and women looking for a faithful companion in life often do not notice that right next to them there are good applicants for this role. A childhood friend, classmate or colleague at work, a good friend and helper, always there, always ready to come, support, for some reason often women do not see a future husband in such a person. And sometimes, on the contrary, two people have been friends for many years, and one of them simply dreams of a relationship, but cannot cross this border. How to go from friendship to love?

This question interests many, but is there friendship between a man and a woman? Someone believes in the existence of such friendship, someone categorically denies that it is possible. Psychologists believe that the friendship of a guy and a girl is very unnatural. Since nature has instincts in us that, at the subconscious level, make us see a sexual object in a representative of the opposite sex.

So is friendship possible between a guy and a girl? If such a friendship takes place, then it is quite possible that these relationships can develop into romantic ones over time. So how do you turn a friendship into a relationship?

A few sure steps on the way from friendship to love

How to turn friendship into something more serious? How to move to a new level of relationship? What can be done to step over the border between these two feelings? If the soul longs for more than just general trips to the cinema and conversations about football, the weather and all sorts of nonsense. If you want more, love and passion. What steps can be taken on this path, how to take relations to a new, more serious level?

Understand what you want

The first thing you need to understand is what kind of partner in life your friend wants to see next to him. By what criteria does he choose a girl, what qualities should she have. For someone it is important that the girl was at home, loved to cook; someone likes a sports girl to run in the park together in the morning; someone is admired by businesslike, strong women, etc. If these criteria suit you, and you meet this ideal, then the chances of success increase significantly.

Stop being a whining vest

Secondly, you need to stop playing the role of a “vest”, refuse to be the person who always listens to failures with other girls, advises how to attract the attention of this or that person. Complete trust is, of course, very good. But this only means that you occupy the place of “best friend” in his fate and nothing more. He simply does not see a woman in you, which means that it would never occur to him to consider you as an object of new love.

Pay Attention

The next thing you can do is draw attention to your appearance. You need to maximize your sexuality. If earlier he constantly saw a girl next to him who always wears a T-shirt and sneakers, then his mind can turn the look of an amazing girl in heels, in a dress and with great styling on her head. At that very moment, he may realize what a gorgeous person there is in his environment. And he will think about whether it is worth getting to know each other better.

More tactile contact

Another tricky trick to change the way you feel about yourself is touch. If earlier you slapped each other on the shoulder, pushed together or shook hands, now you need to try to touch him differently. Tactile sensations speak volumes. If he feels caress and tenderness in touching his face or hands, he will look at this relationship in a completely different way. Such a gesture will make it clear that you are ready to move to a new level of relationship. And whether he is ready or not, it will depend on what will happen next.

stay alone

How to determine if a guy is ready for a closer relationship? You need to create a situation where you find yourself together. Call him for help to your apartment, move something, fix it. To say that there are two tickets to the cinema, where they were going to go with a friend, and she got sick. Invite him to go instead of a friend. This will allow you to become closer, get to know each other better. Perhaps then he will look at you from the other side.

What to say in the end?

If your relationship has become warmer, you are increasingly being together, spending more and more time with each other, then you can try to talk about your feelings for him. It can be just a hint, or the truth dressed up as a joke. It is not necessary to arrange from the recognition of a grandiose event. After all, he may not be mentally prepared for such a statement. It is enough to make it clear that you want something more than friendship. And then, he will decide whether he needs it or not.