The best robot bender quotes from futurama. Ostap Bender's signature phrases

You are an eccentric, Balaganov! Happiness does not know expectation. It has long flown over the ocean and is now basking in the sun near the ocean, singing cheerful tunes. America is a land of permanent and all-encompassing happiness.

According to Ostap, the confusion and disorientation of the enemy is the main, main and paramount direction in the struggle for a valuable trophy. Imbalance mental strength the enemy is the path to triumph and victory. – Ostap Bender

Maybe for complete happiness, baby, in addition to money, they also offer the key to my apartment, where the denyushki lie peacefully?

Let's all hit the rally together with the general sloppiness and impassability all around!

Don't try to think. Be very silent. And do not try to open your mouth, not forgetting to puff out your cheeks.

A modest amount of five hundred rubles will help save a person close to the emperor. Otherwise, we'll give you parabellum! Author - O. Bender

The ice has broken, dear gentlemen of the jury!

- The Vorobyaninovs in their centuries-old history have never extended their hands for alms! “If you don’t agree, you old fool, you will stretch out your legs!”

Time, which is in bulk, - said Ostap, - is money, which is periodically in a stable deficit.

I don't need a perpetual motion machine and I don't need an indelible primus needle either - no one can live forever.

The meeting, oddly enough, continues, gentlemen, dear assessors.

Continuation famous aphorisms and quotes by O. Bender read on the pages:

Statistics knows everything.

How much is opium for the people?

People who do not read newspapers should be morally killed on the spot.

Foreign countries will help us.

Church of the Savior on potatoes.

Do not make food a cult!

Why is that so many? Are oats expensive these days?

Speaking of childhood. As a child, people like you, I killed on the spot. From a slingshot.

Give me the sausage, fool! I will forgive everything!

In the sandy steppes of Arabian land, three proud palms for some reason grew.

It seems that the psychological moment for supper has come, thought Ostap. - Ilya Ilf and Evgeny Petrov. Golden calf

Here's a gray beard for you! Here's a devil in your ribs!

Your gasoline - our ideas.

Russia will not forget you!

Secret alliance sword and yell!

Take care of your pince-nez, Kitty. Everything will start now.

Well, what do you say, Shura?! Maybe we eh-ride!? - Ilya Ilf and Evgeny Petrov. Golden calf

Why are you looking at me like a soldier at a louse?

Ah, you thought? Do you think sometimes? You are a thinker. What is your last name, thinker? Spinoza? Jean Jacques Rousseau? Marcus Aurelius?

A! White acacias, emigration flowers.

Lieutenant Schmidt had three sons. Two are smart, and the third is a fool.

Wine, women and cards are provided to us.

The second stage of stealing a goose. The third stage will begin after the capture of the culprit. It is accompanied by sensitive beatings.

Do not make food a cult!

You have been deceived. You've been given much better fur. These are Shanghai leopards.

Whoever says it's a girl, let him be the first to throw a stone at me!

All smuggling is done in Odessa, on Malaya Arnautskaya street.

No time to hug! Farewell, my love! We parted like ships at sea.

Well articulated, dog. Learn.

Once in the country some roam banknotes, then there must be people who have a lot of them. - Ilya Ilf and Evgeny Petrov. Golden calf

Go, go. I serve only on Saturdays, there is nothing to pour here.

The hearing continues, gentlemen of the jury.

The financial abyss is the deepest of the abysses, you can fall into it all your life.

An international chess tournament should be held in Vasyuki.

You need to erect a monument not made by hands.

What a cold country we live in! We have everything hidden, everything is underground. Soviet millionaire cannot even find the Narkomfin with its super-powerful tax apparatus.

Don't be a lady cow. - Ilya Ilf and Evgeny Petrov. Golden calf

I'll give you parabellum.

No. This is not Rio de Janeiro, this is much worse.

Although we do not have Paris, we are welcome to our hut.

I love old people - you will never get bored with them.

The ice has broken, gentlemen!

Take off your hats, bare your heads. The body will now be removed.

But sin no more, or I will rip out my hands by the roots.

In passion, as in happiness, we are all looking for constancy, But nothing lasts forever under the moon - no.

Whoever says it's a girl, let him be the first to throw a stone at me

Abroad is a myth about the afterlife. Whoever gets there does not return. - Ilya Ilf and Evgeny Petrov. Golden calf

Give me money! Come on money!

I will lead the parade!

Hit or miss. I choose pan, although he is an obvious Pole.

I had with the Soviet government for Last year the most serious disagreements. She wants to build socialism, but I don't want to. I'm bored with building socialism. - Ilya Ilf and Evgeny Petrov. Golden calf

Well, march forward, the trumpet is calling!

Sow reasonable, good, eternal, citizens!

What money? You seem to be asking about some money? The office is writing.

Or maybe you still have the key to the apartment where the money is?

How much is opium for the people?

No applause needed! The Count of Monte Cristo did not work out of me. Will have to retrain as a manager

For every vitamin I feed you, I will demand many small favors from you.

Soon only cats will be born.

Do you know who is sitting there? This is a giant of thought, the father of Russian democracy, a person close to the emperor.

A sultry woman, said Ostap, is a poet's dream. Provincial immediacy. In the center of such subtropics have long been gone, but on the periphery, in the field - they are still found. - Ilya Ilf and Evgeny Petrov. Golden calf

I'll arrange it in such a way that he will bring me his money himself, on a silver platter.

Well articulated, dog.

The secret union of sword and plowshare!

So, Balaganov, you are a dude. Don't be offended. By this I want to indicate precisely the place that you occupy under the sun.

That's all that's left of ten thousand. 34 rubles. And I thought. that we still have seven thousand on the current account. How did it happen? Everything was so fun, we were preparing horns and hooves, life was intoxicating and the Earth was spinning especially for us, and suddenly ...

I would stuff your snout, but Zarathustra won't allow it.

The widow sleeps and has a dream. Sorry to wake her up!

A sultry woman, a poet's dream.

I am certainly not a cherub. I don't have wings, but I respect the Criminal Code. This is my weakness.

Ears from a dead donkey.

I've got White hair? -No way! - So they will. We have great battles ahead of us. You will also turn gray, Balaganov.

The twelve Chairs

Aren't there prehistoric animals in mattresses?
You need to erect a monument not made by hands.
You have been deceived. You've been given much better fur. These are Shanghai leopards.
- What is your political credo? - Always!
An international chess tournament should be held in Vasyuki.
Wine, women and cards are provided to us.
Here's a gray beard for you! Here's a devil in your ribs!
All smuggling is done in Odessa, on Malaya Arnautskaya street.
What regiment did you serve in?
After all, you are not my mother, not my sister, and not my mistress.
Foreign countries will help us.
The hearing continues, gentlemen of the jury.
A sultry woman, a poet's dream.
Signals will fly from Vasyukov to Mars, Jupiter and Neptune.
What money? You seem to be asking about some money?
The office is writing.
Who do you think this powerful old man is? Don't say you can't know. This is a giant of thought, the father of Russian democracy and a person close to the emperor.
Whoever says it's a girl, let him be the first to throw a stone at me!
The ice has broken, gentlemen of the jury!
Maybe give you another key to the apartment where the money is?
We are strangers in this celebration of life.
I would stuff your snout, but Zarathustra won't allow it.
Nobody likes us, except for the Criminal Investigation Department, who doesn't like us either.
Don't be a lady cow.
Bye then! Write letters!..
Well, you're an abortion victim!
Give me the sausage, fool! I will forgive everything!
Ears from a dead donkey.
How much is opium for the people?
The subject of my lecture is a fruitful opening idea. What, comrades, is a debut, and what, comrades, is an idea? The debut, comrades, is "Quasi una fantasia". And what, comrades, is an idea? An idea, comrades, is a human thought clothed in a logical chess form.
Five hundred rubles can save a giant of thought.
Russia will not forget you!
Soon only cats will be born.
The secret union of sword and plowshare!
Although we do not have Paris, we are welcome to our hut.
Why is that so many? Are oats expensive these days?
I'll give you parabellum.

Golden calf

We don't need rude people. We ourselves are rude. Let's go.
A car is not a luxury, but a means of transportation.
Ah, you thought? Do you think sometimes? You are a thinker. What is your last name, thinker? Spinoza? Jean-Jacques Rousseau? Marcus Aurelius?
But what, do I look like a person who can have relatives?
And a locker like “Hey, Slavs!” You won't get much here.
…Right, Shura?
You are not descended from a monkey, like all other citizens, you are descended from a cow.
Did you do something on the floor there? Did you share money?
The countess, with a changed face, runs to the pond.
Load the barrels of oranges brothers Karamazov
I will lead the parade!
By the way, about childhood. As a child, people like you, I killed on the spot. From a slingshot.
Who is Studebaker? Is this your cousin Studebaker? Is your dad a Studebaker? What do you stick to a person?
Maybe we just want to eh-ride?
... On a silver platter.
Do not make a cult out of food.
No applause needed! The Count of Monte Cristo did not work out of me. You will have to retrain as a manager.
No, this is not Rio de Janeiro, this is much worse.
No, I will not choke him with a pillow or hit him on the head with a black revolver...
Don't you know? Meanwhile, many people find that I am strikingly similar to my father.
The original design, the dawn of motoring. See, Balaganov, what can be done from a simple Singer sewing machine? A small adaptation - and it turned out to be a lovely collective farm sheaf binder.
The ashes of the deceased were carried in the arms of relatives and friends.
Just don't shoot at the chandelier, it's superfluous.
Let's hit the rally on the roads and slovenliness!
Church of the Savior on potatoes.
What, hasn't Genosse Polykhaev come yet? Strange.
The broad masses of billionaires are getting acquainted with the life of the new, Soviet village.
Shura, my dear, restore the status quo!
I do not hold out my paw for the sour executive committee ruble.
I am the son of Lieutenant Schmidt.
I want to leave here. Over the past year, I have had the most serious disagreements with the Soviet government. She wants to build socialism, but I don't want to.

How well do you know nationwide famous character books by I. Ilf and E. Petrov? We are glad to present to your attention the most remarkable quotes of the ideological fighter for banknotes Ostap Ibragimovich Bender or Ostap Bert Maria Bender Bey:

The twelve Chairs

You are a true labor hero. You need to erect a monument not made by hands!

You have been deceived. You've been given much better fur. These are Shanghai leopards.

Wine, women and cards are provided to us.

Here's the police! Here you have the high cost of chairs for the working people of all countries! Here's to you night walks on the girls! Here's a gray beard for you! Here's a devil in your ribs!

The time we have is the money we don't have.

All smuggling is done in Odessa, on Malaya Arnautskaya street.

What regiment did you serve in?

After all, you are not my mother, not my sister, and not my mistress. (Vorobyaninov)

You are a vulgar person, Kitty!

There are also sleeves from the vest, a hole from a donut and a dead donkey's ears.

Foreign countries will help us.

The hearing continues, gentlemen of the jury.

A sultry woman, a poet's dream.

What money? You seem to have asked me about some money?

I will lead the parade!

The office is writing.

Who do you think this powerful old man is? Don't say you can't know. This is a giant of thought, the father of Russian democracy and a person close to the emperor.

Whoever says it's a girl, let him be the first to throw a stone at me! (about Vorobyaninov)

The ice has broken, gentlemen of the jury!

Maybe give you another key to the apartment where the money is?

We are strangers in this celebration of life. (to Vorobyaninov, meaning only both of them)

I would stuff your snout, but Zarathustra won't allow it.

Don't be a lady cow.

Bye then! Write letters!..

Well, you're an abortion victim!

He loved and suffered. He loved money and suffered from its lack.

Ears from a dead donkey, you will get from Pushkin ...

Give me the sausage, fool! I will forgive everything!

How much is opium for the people?

The subject of my lecture is a fruitful opening idea. What, comrades, is a debut, and what, comrades, is an idea? The debut, comrades, is "Quasi una fantasia". And what, comrades, is an idea? An idea, comrades, is a human thought clothed in a logical chess form.

Five hundred rubles can save a giant of thought.

Russia will not forget you!

Soon only cats will be born.

Doubt our money?!

The secret union of sword and plowshare! The complete secret of the organization!

Wipe your eyes, citizen. Each tear of yours is a molecule in space.

This is typical foppishness: to rob a poor widow.

I'll give you parabellum.

You are not in the church, you will not be deceived!

Golden calf

We don't need rude people. We ourselves are rude.

A car is not a luxury, but a means of transportation.

Ah, you thought? Do you think sometimes? You are a thinker. What is your last name, thinker? Spinoza? Jean-Jacques Rousseau? Marcus Aurelius?

But what, do I look like a person who can have relatives?

Your gasoline - our ideas.

The wreckage of a shipwreck floats in this naval borscht.

All in Avtodor, comrades!

You are not descended from a monkey, like all other citizens, you are descended from a cow. Thinking for too long!

The countess, with a changed face, runs to the pond.

Load the barrels of oranges brothers Karamazov

Go, go, I only serve on Saturdays.

I will lead the parade!

By the way, about childhood. As a child, people like you, I killed on the spot. From a slingshot.

Who is Studebaker? Is this your cousin Studebaker? Is your dad a Studebaker? What do you stick to a person? … Connoisseurs! You need to kill such connoisseurs! Give him a Studebaker!

Mother intercessor, three-handed police!

I am thirty-three years old - the age of Jesus Christ. What have I done so far? He did not create the teachings, he squandered his students, he did not resurrect the dead Panikovsky.

Maybe we just want to eh-ride?

We won't forgive them! We will remember them!

- ... on a silver platter.

- ... call me not monsieur, but situationyen ...

Do not make a cult out of food.

Do not eat raw tomatoes at night!

No applause needed! The Count of Monte Cristo did not work out of me. You will have to retrain as a manager.

No, this is not Rio de Janeiro, this is much worse.

No, I will not choke him with a pillow or hit him on the head with a blued revolver...

Don't you know? Meanwhile, many people find that I am strikingly similar to my father.

The original design, the dawn of motoring. See, Balaganov, what can be done from a simple Singer sewing machine? A small adaptation - and it turned out to be a lovely collective farm sheaf binder.

Everything is there inside: palm trees, girls, blue express trains, blue sea, white steamer, little-worn tuxedo, Japanese footman, own billiards, platinum teeth, whole socks, dinners in pure animal oil and, most importantly, my little friends, fame and the power that money gives.

Just don't shoot at the chandelier, it's superfluous.

Let's hit the rally on the roads and slovenliness!

The broad masses of billionaires are getting acquainted with the life of the new, Soviet village.

Shura, my dear, restore the status quo!

I have often been unfair to the deceased. But was the deceased a moral person? No, he was not a moral person. It was a former blind man, an impostor and a goose thief. He put all his strength into living at the expense of society. But society did not want him to live at his expense. And Mikhail Samuelevich could not endure this contradiction in his views, because he had a quick temper. And so he died. All!

Is this the Governor of Borneo?

I do not hold out my paw for the sour executive committee ruble.

I am not a surgeon, I am a neuropathologist, I am a psychiatrist. I study the souls of my patients. And for some reason I always come across very stupid souls.

- ... I, you know, not a financier. I am a freelance artist and a cold philosopher.

I am certainly not a cherub. I don't have wings, but I respect the Criminal Code. This is my weakness.

Church of the Savior on potatoes.

The ice has broken, gentlemen of the jury, the ice has broken.

Maybe give you another key to the apartment where the money is?

Ostap went into a room that could only be furnished by a creature with the imagination of a woodpecker.

Is this your boy?

Boy, is it bad? Typical boy. Whoever says it's a girl, let him be the first to throw a stone at me!

The client must be accustomed to the idea that he will have to give money. He must be morally disarmed, his reactionary possessive instincts must be suppressed.

I am certainly not a cherub. I don't have wings, but I respect the Criminal Code. This is my weakness.

This mental exercise seems to have exhausted you greatly. You are becoming stupid right before your eyes.

You have to show him some paper, otherwise he won't believe that you exist.

The financial abyss is the deepest of all abysses, you can fall into it all your life

He loved and suffered. He loved money and suffered from its lack.

It's not so bad to be a beggar, especially with a moderate education and a weak voice setting!

However, you can leave, but I warn you, we have long arms! ... He stayed - "long arms" made an unfavorable impression on him.

Ostap quickly pulled it out of Panikovsky's hands, saying:
- Do not make a cult out of food.
After that, he ate the cucumber himself.

Monsieur, it's not mange pa sis jour. Geben world zi bitteetvas kopeck auf dem shtuk ford. Give something to the former deputy of the State Duma.

Cold soft-boiled eggs - the food is very tasteless, and a good, cheerful person will never eat them.

Over the past year, I have had the most serious disagreements with the Soviet government. She wants to build socialism, but I don't want to. I'm bored with building socialism.

Do not knock your bald head on the parquet

You are not in the church, you will not be deceived.

How much is opium for the people?

Life, gentlemen of the jury, is a complicated thing, but, gentlemen of the jury, this thing opens like a box.
You just need to know how to open it. Who can not open, he disappears

I will lead the parade!

Pedestrians must be loved. Pedestrians make up the majority of humanity. Moreover, the best part of it. Pedestrians created the world.

Your gasoline - our ideas.

In our vast country, an ordinary car, intended, according to pedestrians, for the peaceful transportation of people and goods, has taken on the formidable outlines of a fratricidal projectile.

The sunset was pure, naive, as if a provincial young lady had painted it long before the first, terrible thoughts about men came into her head.

If you see an American laughing, it does not mean that he is funny. He laughs for the reason that an American should laugh.

You can be a nice and smart boy, do well in school, do well in university science - and after several years of regular attendance at the cinema, turn into an idiot.

Rio de Janeiro is the crystal dream of my childhood, do not touch it with your paws.

There is always a person who struggles to speak last.

He got so drunk that he could already work various small miracles.

Just don't shoot at the chandelier, it's superfluous.

He courted a typist whose modest hips unleashed his poetic feelings.

You are a rather vulgar person, you love money more than you should.
- Don't you like money?
- I do not like.
Why do you need sixty thousand?
- Out of principle!

Although we do not have Paris, we are welcome to our hut.

You are an interesting person! Everything is fine with you. Surprisingly, with such happiness - and at large!

After reading and laughing, you understand why the main character of "The Twelve Chairs" and "The Golden Calf" Ostap-Suleiman-Berta-Maria-Bender-Beit, who is also the son of a Turkish citizen, became our favorite hero

Folk joke:

Why India has the strongest marriages? Yes, because a husband is given a gun for a wedding, and a red dot is drawn on a woman’s forehead.

Other related news:

According to the candidate of sciences from Kharkov N. Aksenova...

Ostap-Suleiman-Bertha-Maria Bender-bey (Transdanubian), or simply Ostap Bender - main character novels by Ilya Ilf and Evgeny Petrov "The Twelve Chairs" and "The Golden Calf", " grand schemer”,“ the son of a Turkish citizen”, “an ideological fighter for banknotes”, who knew “four hundred relatively honest ways of taking (withdrawing) money”. One of the most popular heroes of the picaresque novel in Russian literature.

1. Kitty, you are a dense provincial! Now no one uses the services of the cash desk, for this there is an administrator window.

2. Keep in mind, dear Shura, I do not intend to feed you for nothing. For every vitamin I feed you, I will demand many small favors from you.

3. Everything is taken into account by a mighty hurricane ...

4. I have all the vulgar signs of falling in love: lack of appetite, insomnia and a manic desire to compose poetry. Listen to what I sprinkled last night in the flickering light of an electric lamp: "I remember wonderful moment you appeared in front of me fleeting vision like a genius of pure beauty." Really, okay? Talented? And only at dawn, when the last lines were completed, I remembered that this verse had already been written by A. Pushkin. Such a hit from a classic! A?

5. Mother intercessor, three-handed police! What kind of banal bureaucracy disgusted by everyone?

6. Don't overthink. Be quiet. And don't forget to puff out your cheeks.

7. Well, adye, great country. I don't like being the first student and getting grades for attention, diligence and behavior. I am a private person and have no obligation to be interested in silos, trenches and towers. Somehow, I am little interested in the problem of the socialist transformation of a person into an angel and a savings bank depositor. Vice versa. I'm interested in burning questions careful attitude to the personality of single millionaires.

8. You have to think. For example, I am fed with ideas.

9. Tell me, Shura, honestly, how much money do you need to be happy?... Not today, but in general. For happiness. Clear? For you to be well in the world.

10. There are people who do not know how to suffer, somehow it does not work out. And if they do suffer, they try to do it as quickly as possible and inconspicuously to others.

11. Here's a gray beard for you! Here's a devil in your ribs!

12. - What does this mean?
- It means that you are a retarded person.
- Why?
- Because! Forgive me for the vulgar question: how much money do you have?
- What money?

13. - Is it possible so - chairs in the morning, and money in the evening?
- Can! But money - go ahead!

14. The first move is E2-E4, and then... And then we'll see.

15. You are amazingly quick-witted, dear stool hunter, as you can see, there are no diamonds.

16. Why are you looking at me like a soldier at a louse? Overwhelmed with happiness?

17. Half of mine - half of ours ...

19. Workers from you are like a sieve from a dog's tail.

20. Transport is completely out of hand, there is only one thing left - to convert to Islam and travel on camels.

21. And in general - your gasoline, but our ideas!

22. I am an ideological fighter for banknotes!

23. In passion, as in happiness, we all seek constancy,
But nothing lasts forever under the moon - no.

24. - Never, never Vorobyaninov held out his hand!
- So stretch your legs, you old fool!

25. Hit or miss. I choose pan, although he is an obvious Pole.

26. Cold soft-boiled eggs - the food is very tasteless, and good, cheerful person will never eat them.

27. Good poses, dog.

28. That's all that's left of ten thousand. 34 rubles. And I thought. that we still have seven thousand on the current account. How did it happen? Everything was so fun, we were preparing horns and hooves, life was intoxicating and the Earth was spinning especially for us, and suddenly...

29. In the sandy steppes of the Arabian land, three proud palm trees grew for some reason.

30. What a cold country we live in! We have everything hidden, everything is underground. The Soviet millionaire cannot be found even by the Narkomfin with its super-powerful tax apparatus.

31. Do not make a cult out of food!

32. There is no such girl in the world who would not know, at least a week in advance, about the impending expression of feelings.

33. Statistics knows everything.

34. Let's walk on the lawns, being fined.

35. I would stuff your snout, but Zarathustra does not allow it.

36. Brace yourselves! Russia will not forget you! Foreign countries will help us!

37. - There is no time to hug, - he said. Farewell darling. We parted like ships at sea.

38. The most important thing, - said Ostap, walking around the spacious room of the Carlsbad Hotel, - is to bring confusion to the enemy camp. The enemy must lose his mental balance. It's not that hard to do. After all, people are most afraid of the unknown.

39. In our vast country, an ordinary car, intended, according to pedestrians, for the peaceful transportation of people and goods, has taken on the formidable outlines of a fratricidal projectile.

40. You always think: “I still have time to do this. There will be plenty more milk and hay in my life.” In fact, it will never happen again. So you know: it was the best night in our lives, my poor friends. And you didn't even notice it.

41. I have often been unfair to the deceased. But was the deceased a moral person? No, he was not a moral person. It was a former blind man, an impostor and a goose thief. He put all his strength into living at the expense of society. But society did not want him to live at his expense. And Mikhail Samuelevich could not endure this contradiction in his views, because he had a quick temper. And so he died. All!

42. No applause needed! The Count of Monte Cristo did not work out of me. You will have to retrain as a manager.

43. I am 33 years old - the age of Jesus Christ, but what have I done? He did not create the teachings, he squandered his students, he did not resurrect poor Panikovsky!

44. Here I am a millionaire! Dream come true idiot!

45. Panikovsky will sell you all, buy and sell you again ... but more expensive.

46. ​​The main thing is to eliminate the cause of sleep. The main reason is the very existence of Soviet power. But in this moment I cannot remove it. I just don't have time.

47. Since you live in a Soviet country, then your dreams must be Soviet.

48. Of course, I am not a cherub. I don't have wings, but I respect the Criminal Code. This is my weakness.

49. Comrades!.. The political situation in Europe... Our answer to Chamberlain...

50. Serious disagreements have arisen between me and the Soviet authorities over the past year. She wants to build socialism, but I don't want to. I'm bored with building socialism.

51. Abroad is a myth about the afterlife. Whoever gets there does not return.

52. Since some banknotes are roaming around the country, then there must be people who have a lot of them.

53. Women love: young, politically literate, long-legged ...

54. I don't need an eternal primus needle, I don't want to live forever.

55. “It seems that the psychological moment for dinner has come,” thought Ostap.

56. Don't be a lady cow.

57. Well, what do you say, Shura?! Maybe we eh-ride!?

58. A sultry woman, said Ostap, is a poet's dream. Provincial immediacy. In the center of such subtropics have long been gone, but on the periphery, in the field - they are still found.

59. Time, - he said, - that we have, is money that we do not have.

60. I ask you, citizen, to clear the chair.

61. It's time for you, leader, to be treated with electricity.

62. - You are a rather vulgar person, - Bender objected, - you love money more than necessary.

63. You are a dude, the son of a dude and your children will be dudes!

64. Why are you yelling like a polar bear in warm weather?

65. The financial abyss is the deepest of all abysses, you can fall into it all your life.

66. When I see this new life, these shifts, I don't feel like smiling, I feel like praying!

67. By the way, about childhood, in my childhood I killed people like you on the spot. From a slingshot.

68. But we don't need rude people. We ourselves are rude.

69. - Life! - said Ostap. - Victim! What do you know about life and about victims? Do you think that if you were evicted from a mansion, you know what life is? And if a fake Chinese vase was requisitioned from you, do you know what a sacrifice is? Life, gentlemen of the jury, is a complicated thing, but, gentlemen of the jury, this complicated thing opens just like a box. You just need to know how to open it. Who does not know how, he disappears.

70. You are an interesting person! Everything is fine with you. Surprisingly, with such happiness - and at large!

71. In big world people are driven by the desire to benefit humanity. Small world far from such lofty matters. Its inhabitants have one desire - to somehow live without feeling hungry.

72. Kitty, let's perpetuate ourselves. Let's kill Mika baki. By the way, I have chalk! By God, I’ll climb right now and write: “Kisa and Osya were here.”

73. Give me the sausage, give me the sausage, fool! I will forgive everything!

74. An idea is a human thought denounced in a logical chess form.

75. - Well, uncle, are there any brides in your city?
- To whom the mare is the bride.
- I have no more questions.

76. He loved and suffered. He loved money and suffered from its lack.

77. Life dictates its harsh laws to us.

79. And can they give you the key to the apartment where the money is?

80. Closer to the body, as Maupassant said!

81. A car, comrades, is not a luxury, but a means of transportation!

82. Secret union of sword and plowshare! The complete secret of the organization!

83. I consider the evening of memories closed.

84. Well, you are an abortion victim!

85. What money? You seem to have asked me about some money?

86. The ice has broken, gentlemen of the jury!

87. All smuggling is done in Odessa, on Malaya Arnautskaya street.

88. Boy ... Is it bad? Whoever says it's a girl, let him throw a stone at me first!

89. I will command the parade!

90. - And for what purpose is the fee charged?!
- To repair the failure.
- To not fall too far!

91. We are strangers at this celebration of life.

92. When they beat you, you will cry!

93. Rio de Janeiro is a crystal dream of my childhood: do not touch it with your paws.

94. We will wear cambric footcloths, eat Margot's cream.

95. - I'm buying a plane! - hastily said the great strategist. - Wrap it in paper.

96. Fate plays with man, and man plays the trumpet.

97. Complete peace of mind can give a person only an insurance policy.

98. The Koreiko investigation can consume a lot of time. How many - only God knows. Since there is no God, no one knows. Terrible position.

99. You are not in the church, you will not be deceived.

100. The meeting continues, gentlemen of the jury.