Diplomacy: psychological aspects of communication. Why is it important to be a diplomat in everyday life

Be open-minded about new ideas. You don't always have to make decisions alone. Also try to understand the other person's point of view. Always thank the person for being sincere so that they don't hesitate to express their feelings. Analyze other people's views, but be firm and decisive if you think your decision is the best choice.

• Say, “Thank you for your candor, Andrew. I will certainly take into account your comments and consider new studies on this issue.”

Use confident words and body language. In a conversation, you do not need to be aggressive, but you should show self-confidence. Speak slowly and consider your words. Make eye contact with people and don't cross your arms or legs.

• Don't be afraid to admit that you don't know something. For example, say, "I'm not very familiar with this topic and I'm not ready to answer right now, but I'll definitely look into your question."

Use evasive words. Be slightly evasive so you don't express all of your thoughts and feelings too directly. Make assumptions, not prescriptions. Diplomatic people do not shout out orders, but inspire others to take necessary action. Your goal is to collaborate with the team to inspire people to work effectively.

• For example, if you need to reconcile two children, say: "You both should think about how best to divide the space in the room so that you fight less."
• Tell an employee who is often late, “Have you ever tried taking a bypass road to work? Due to the absence of traffic jams, I have repeatedly reached faster.” Such words should be spoken only to those people with whom you are in good relations, otherwise your advice may be perceived as passive aggression.

Watch your manners. Good manners are an important aspect of diplomacy. Take turns speaking and never interrupt the other person. Try to inspire the person and do without insults. Do not yell, do not swear, and speak in your normal voice.

Key words: influence, business conversation, diplomacy, gestures, manipulation, facial expressions, communication, negotiations, body movement.

Key words: influence, diplomacy, gesture, manipulation, facial personal contact, negotiations, talks, motion.

In this paper, we consider psychological aspects communicative activity of a diplomat, in particular non-verbal techniques, the most common gestures, special attention is paid to the so-called neuro-linguistic programming, in other words, the basics of effective communication between people.

This paper discusses the psychological aspects of communication activities to the diplomat, in particular non-verbal techniques, the most common gestures, special attention is paid to the so-called neuro-linguistic programming, and in other words, the basics of effective communication between people.

In the Great Soviet Encyclopedia, the word "diplomacy" has the following definition: "The official activities of the heads of state, government and special bodies of foreign relations to achieve the goals and objectives foreign policy states, as well as to protect the interests of the state abroad. Serves the interests of the ruling classes. In the literature, it is often customary to define diplomacy as "the science of foreign relations", as "the art of negotiating".

To quote the Big Law Dictionary, this is "One of the ways to implement the foreign policy of the state." For successful diplomatic activity, it is necessary to have a good knowledge of international relations and the state of affairs in each country.

“The task of diplomacy is to maintain communication between two sovereign states through negotiations,” writes famous author works on diplomacy Englishman Harold Nicholson, British diplomat and historian. In 1939 he published Diplomacy, now considered a classic of its kind. Nicholson noted that despite the fact that diplomats communicate using some generally accepted international code (special phrases, expressions and words), nevertheless, even they are not immune from the fact that foreign colleagues will misunderstand them.

The role of human communicative activity in modern world it is difficult to overestimate, especially speaking of diplomacy. Speech occupies a special position in the hierarchy mental processes, thanks to which it acts as the main means of communication, an instrument of thinking and is part of human culture.

Communication is a multifaceted process of developing contacts between people, generated by the needs of joint activities. Communication includes the exchange of information between its participants, which can be characterized as the communicative side of communication.

The art of communication is an essential skill. To become a master of communication, it is necessary to develop a wide variety of skills: this is oratory, and the ability to manage conflict, and negotiation skills, and adjustment to the interlocutor, mastery of facial expressions, voice and gestures.

The art of communication occupies a special place in the life of a diplomat. A diplomat must be able to communicate with different segments of the population correctly and competently. The ability to speak a language is one of the main tools of a diplomat.

For a negotiating diplomat, work begins long before he meets his opponent. First of all, it is necessary to study the problem to be discussed. General rule it's simple - the more you know, the better. Even in ancient times, it was believed that a good diplomat should be a versatile educated person. Aristotle in his "Rhetoric" gives a long list of sciences that a future diplomat must master before he dares to show himself in the field of foreign policy. Ancient Greek diplomats had to understand not only current political issues, but at the same time be proficient in geography, history, economics, military affairs and be good speakers. However, there are exceptions to this rule. When a diplomat is involved in a complex negotiation process for a long time, he sometimes goes into too much detail and loses sight of the perspective.

Negotiations are, in essence, the basis of diplomacy and the ability to negotiate is the "highest aerobatics" in the diplomatic profession. This matter is far from simple. Diplomatic negotiations have a number of features that make them significantly different from, say, negotiations in business and even from domestic political negotiations.

First of all, the diplomat, building his negotiating position, proceeds from the concept of "national interest". This means that his position should be supra-party and not depend on ideological and other interests.

During negotiations, all means of pressure on the enemy are usually used. Participants begin by laying out their initial positions, often including exaggerated demands, and often do so in an ultimatum form. During negotiations between rivals, in order to cause confusion for the opponent, the parties often put forward additional demands at moments when all the main parameters of a future agreement, it would seem, have already been agreed upon. Very often, linking of objectively unrelated or weakly related issues is used. Negotiations between rivals are usually accompanied by a propaganda campaign in the media, calculated to put even more pressure on the enemy.

Participation in negotiations of this type is associated with great psychological stress. It is important to refrain from emotional reactions, which the enemy often counts on. It is also important not to reject his proposals out of the blue, but to try to find positive elements in them and rephrase them in such a way that an acceptable wording is obtained. Even in the most tense atmosphere, it is desirable to say "yes" with reservations more often than an unequivocal "no".

Psychological preparation for business conversation and the mood for a partner is a very important thing, but not decisive. The result depends on preparedness, but is determined by how the conversation itself will be built. In order not to make obvious mistakes in building a conversation, psychologists suggest using the following basic principles.

1. Rationality. During the conversation, it is necessary to behave with restraint, even if the partner shows emotions. Why? First, uncontrolled emotions always negatively affect the decision. Secondly, there is a psychological rule that says: "The one who is more calm wins the discussion." Calmness and rationality are the best response to a surge of emotions from a partner.

2. Understanding. It is necessary to try to understand the interlocutor. After all, he is trying to explain his position, to bring his opinion to the interlocutor, but due to inattention to his point of view, he cannot achieve the goal. And this causes irritation and threatens mutual misunderstanding of positions. Before influencing the position of a communication partner, you should understand it.

3. Attention. It has been established that during the conversation the level of concentration of attention fluctuates. And this happens even when there are no distractions. Concentration and attention throughout the conversation are not the same. The human psyche is arranged in such a way that in the process of obtaining information, he needs breaks from time to time. At these moments, attention involuntarily dissipates, and the interlocutor seems to “drop out” for several minutes, turn off the conversation. At such moments, you should verbally or non-verbally attract his attention, restore the broken contact. The best way to do this, ask the question: "Are you listening to me?"

4. Reliability. Don't give in conversation false information even when the interlocutor does it. Otherwise, a tactical one can turn into a strategic defeat.

5. Delimitation. Establishing a boundary between the interlocutor and the subject of conversation is a very important psychological principle. In the process of communication, we often identify what the partner says with him or even with our attitude towards him. Pleasant information communicated by an unpleasant interlocutor loses half of its attractiveness. Our personal attitude towards a person whom we dislike often makes it difficult to objectively evaluate the information that he communicates. To avoid this, one should pay attention, first of all, to what exactly is reported, and not to what and how it is reported.

As in any other technology, there are a huge number of techniques in NLP.

1. Rapport. Rapport is a rather fragile form feedback in the process of communication, causing in the interlocutor the feeling that he is understood, that he is liked. In the case of good rapport, the interlocutor develops a sense of trust in the communicator. In diplomacy, the ability to create “rapports” correctly can be very useful, since a diplomat who inspires confidence will be able to negotiate more successfully than his colleague who does not inspire confidence.

During the installation of rapport, it is important to be able to adjust. Adjustment happens:

Posture adjustment. When rapport is created, you should first take the same pose as the partner's - "reflect" the partner's pose.

Breathing adjustment. Variants are possible here: adjustment to breathing can be direct and indirect. Direct adjustment - start breathing at the same pace as the partner. Indirect adjustment - coordination with the rhythm of the partner's breathing of some part of his behavior, for example, swinging his hand to the beat of the partner's breathing, or speaking to the beat of his breathing, that is, on his exhalation. Direct tuning is more effective in creating rapport.

Adjustment to movement. It is more complex than the previous types of adjustment, because both posture and breathing are something relatively unchanging and constant, this can be considered and started to be copied gradually. Movement is a relatively fast process, in this regard, the communicator will need, firstly, observation, and secondly, you need to think in advance that the partner could not realize the actions of the communicator.

"Mirror" must be extremely careful and delicate, otherwise it will cause the exact opposite reaction. Adjustment is followed by guiding, when the communicator, by changing his behavior, causes changes in the partner's behavior. The primary lead is also a test of how well the rapport works.

2. Eye access keys. A person is arranged in such a way that at the time when he thinks and speaks, his eyeballs move. Our eyes demonstrate the features of memory and the process of thinking, show how a person accesses the information encoded in our brain. When talking with an interlocutor, you can notice that his eyes are in constant motion.

It is important for a diplomat not only to be able to correctly interpret views, but also to take care of himself, to control himself.

Looking up and to the left: visual memory. These are images of the past stored in visual memory. This includes dreams, constructed images that have already been "seen" before.

Looking up and to the right: constructing visual images. As a rule, here a person constructs images that he has not seen.

Looking horizontally to the left: auditory memory. Memorized sounds (speech sounds, melodies, often phone numbers, memorized verses without focusing on meaning - rhythmic memorization).

Looking horizontally to the right: auditory construction. Usually this is a constructed speech or construction of sounds with a new timbre, rhythm, pitch, etc.

Looking down to the left: internal dialogue. The internal dialogue is a commentary on experience. Internal dialogue can be a tool of rational logical thinking.

Looking down to the right: feelings. At this point, the person can access emotions and kinesthetic experiences. A characteristic posture for people who are depressed: head down, “drooping” look, looking down to the right (or down to the left).

Defocused eyes: the person is in at least two systems. For example, he hears and sees, sees and feels, and perhaps all together. This state is called a light trance with an altered consciousness.

3. Template break. Many of our actions are performed according to a certain program, repeated hundreds and thousands of times without changes: greeting, handshake, smoking. When acquaintances meet and ask, "How are you?", they are not really interested in the state of affairs - they are simply operating on a program called "greeting" that provides a formulaic answer: "Okay" to a formulaic question.

You can ask: "How are you?" answer: "Terrible, I'll die soon"; or start talking in detail about your affairs: “Yes, just imagine, yesterday in the metro on Vasileostrovskaya all the legs were trampled, and today I didn’t hear the alarm clock, I overslept, I was late for the lecture. I actually wanted to go to bed early, but it didn’t work out: at first we watched TV with the neighbors, and then I remembered that I still had a lot to do ... ”. Such behavior does not correspond to the generally accepted program and causes confusion in the partner. And this situation of confusion can be used - if the partner’s old program of behavior, the old template is broken, it is possible to impose on him new program.

It's very good and effective reception, but it should be used in diplomatic practice with extreme caution, because. it is necessary to comply with strict diplomatic protocol, the violation of which is fraught with serious consequences not only for the image of a particular diplomat, but also for international relations

These basic aspects of body language will help the diplomat make a good impression on others.

Face. The face should be lively, more smiles, but in moderation. It is necessary to take care of the teeth in order to be able to sparkle them.

Gestures. Gestures should be expressive, but also in moderation. During gestures, fingers should not be spread out, and hands should be kept below the level of the chin, without crossing arms and legs.

Head movements. You should nod more often, confirming what the interlocutor said, and listening - tilt your head to one side. Keep your chin up.

Eye contact. Eye contact should not cause feelings of embarrassment and discomfort. If national traditions do not prohibit looking directly into the eyes of the interlocutor, then those who look directly win more trust than those who prefer to look away.

Posture. When listening, you should lean forward. When speaking, stand up straight.

Territory. You should stand at a comfortable distance from the interlocutor. If the interlocutor retreats, you should not approach him.

Mirroring. With the skills of mirroring, you can imperceptibly copy the signals of the language, body movements of the interlocutors.

The psychological and political qualities of a diplomat are manifested in his activity, behavior, work and diplomatic activities. Diplomacy is a professional labor activity and, moreover, a scientific and practical activity. In the same way she is scientific discipline, like physics, mathematics, biology, only its subject is power, the "psychological and practical field of power", no less natural than a gravitational or magnetic field.

The choice of means of influencing the state of people and the application of management methods to them imply exceptionally high characteristics for the diplomat himself - possession developed self-control, self-regulation, self-management and self-education, knowledge in the field of practical psychology.

Choosing between means of influence, a diplomat takes risks like in no other way. labor activity. Only success, victory releases him from responsibility. In case of defeat, he will either end his career (political death), condemnation or terror (physical death), a ban on the profession (professional death), discredit in the media and historical literature(moral death). The choice of means is associated with difficult psychological experiences, with extremely difficult decisions.

The main problems that I had to face in the course of preparing this work are the lack of a sufficient amount of literature on the psychological aspects of communicative activity specifically in diplomacy.

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