How to get rid of attachment to a person. Emotional release technique

Attachment to someone or something brings us both pleasure and suffering, and sometimes it seems that there is much more suffering, and then the question arises: how to get rid of our attachments?

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How to get rid of attachment

Take a look at the life of little children, but it's better if you remember
your own childhood.

I remember one incident from my childhood. One day with my mother
walking around the children's toy store and I saw a toy transformer. This
the transformer was quite expensive for the price, but it is so strong to me
I liked that I was ready for anything, for any tricks and tricks to make him
get! Mom promised that in two weeks, after payday, this
the transformer will be mine. I had no choice and I agreed. These two weeks
were a living hell!) I waited with such trepidation and impatience and finally waited. I
fell in love with this toy. I was so delighted and happy that I have her
there is ... Happiness knew no bounds. I took it with me everywhere - to the kindergarten, for walks,
I went to bed with him, played in every possible way, fiddled with him. I thought I couldn't
fall out of love never. I didn't waste a minute not to enjoy his presence.
me, I seemed to be immersed in all my vibrations in him, it was
indescribable and at that time - it was a big buzz for me.

It was a week, a second, a month, and one day I realized -
that I no longer have any interest. At the time, I didn't even think about it.
not try to understand and realize what happened, I just lost every
interest.

In fact, that's all, all you need to know. At all
the rest, and with life itself on Earth, the situation is exactly the same.

There is only one single reason that attracts us
to any objects, people, events, and this reason is a mystery, suspense, misunderstanding!
You are always attracted only when you are absolutely unaware of the object of attraction.
Nothing. You do not have this object at your disposal, you have no knowledge of
German And that one reason is the mystery that makes you
be attracted to something that arouses interest and curiosity within you
something. Until you have a physical, sensual, mental and spiritual
experience with something - it will always attract you, it will not give you
rest. Inside you will want to comprehend what is still a secret from you!


Now we need to understand what is associated with such a property as
attachment to something. For myself, by attachment I mean that
a person wants to have something, to possess something for a relatively long period of time.
Let it be material attachments or spiritual attachments. Attachment -
it is the opposite effect of being indifferent to something. Attachment to an object
arises when a person longs to know something, but cannot do it
make it to the end. And indifference arises precisely when a person
striving wholeheartedly to comprehend the secret of the object, jumps headlong into this comprehension
and eventually comprehends it.

Think for yourself, what do you want most in your life?
Money? Love? Happiness? Beloved person? Prestige? Sex? Look at
your life and you will see that you are craving exactly what you never had in
their lives in abundance, than they could not fully get enough of.

And now, perhaps, I will surprise you greatly by saying that
you have never in your life even thought about the most IMPORTANT and most important
things. Tell me, have you ever wanted to see the Sun? Have you ever regretted
breathe oxygen, did you yearn for your parents or for your job?)
to say boldly that air is the most important thing for any person. If without
food you can live for a few weeks, without water you can live a few
days, without love you can live a very long time, without joy you can live a long time ... but
you won't last ten minutes without air. Have you ever paid attention
the most important thing in your life? Have you ever wished you had this
air, have you been thirsty for it? No! Because you absolutely know about it
everything, he is not interesting for you, he is always with you, he is always at your disposal.

Have you ever wondered why you crave money? Why
you such an inadequate and unconscious attachment to them? And the answer is
precisely in the fact that you never had enough of them to get enough
them, and to comprehend them completely! Do you think rich people care about money?)
Personally, when I had periods in my life, and I had a lot of money, including
quantity in which I could afford to buy anything I want with them, in this
time I never thought about them.

Why am I writing this. To the fact that the only thing
which makes you want something, become attached to something - this is your
insatiation with this thing! When you desire something but don't dive into it
wholeheartedly, do not begin to enjoy this object - inside you arise
attachment to this object. When you meet something that you are drawn to, that you
want to receive, and if you, like a child, immerse yourself with your whole being in
object of desire, then be sure that there will come a moment when you are completely
feed on it when the mystery is revealed and the interest disappears completely! All!
There have never been and never will be other ways to remove attachment. The more complete you
immersed in the object of their desire with all their levels - physical,
sensual, mental, spiritual, the faster you will become indifferent to
this object!

Any stiffness, restraint, any internal control
will inevitably lead to dissatisfaction, incompleteness of comprehension - and this
will inevitably lead you to attachment to what you are trying to limit yourself to
Or what do you want to protect yourself from?


No fasting, no austerities, restrictions or hard
control over yourself will never give you spiritual insight and freedom!! How
the more you restrain and protect yourself from worldly goods, the more you
bind yourself to them! The one and only way to be free to anything is
it is to completely immerse yourself in it, to fully live and let your soul through the knowable desired object.

A person who has achieved freedom from worldly attachments
through control has a very shaky freedom! Such a person has to
keep your mind under control all the time... The slightest relaxation of the mind can
lead to ruin, to a sharp temptation by those from which he is fleeing!

Read the article in full on the self-knowledge forum.

Good mood, happiness and freedom from excessive attachments!

To understand that you are tied to a satellite, practical recommendations will help.

  1. A girl who is dependent on a man (attached to him) constantly wants to be close to her partner. She is tormented by obsessive thoughts about where and with whom he is.
  2. Eccentric natures are "led" to the appearance of a man. They are fascinated only by his inflated torso, white-toothed smile, dimples on his cheeks, and not by the spiritual component. This aspect characterizes affection, not love.
  3. It is easy to distinguish between two feelings by observing general condition. If you notice that at first you begin to be interested in a man, and the next moment you practically forget about him - this is attachment.
  4. Many girls who are in a relationship experience a lack of love and tenderness all the time. If you truly love, feelings literally begin to warm from the inside. Such couples can overcome everything.
  5. To understand that you have become attached to a man, brief observations will help. If you have abandoned hobbies, work, and other stages of personal growth, feelings are not love. You plunged (attached) not to your own "I", but to the gentleman.
  6. Attachment is also characterized by a sharp decrease in the number of people with whom close contacts were maintained yesterday. Often a girl cannot experience positive emotions in communicating with friends and colleagues, because she is completely passionate about her betrothed.
  7. As mentioned earlier, love helps to overcome all obstacles without developing depression. Attachment, in turn, causes excessive negative emotions at separation. Many girls experience tremendous stress when a partner is not around for 2-3 hours.
  8. A sober look at behavior in a quarrel will help to distinguish affection from love. If you only want to quarrel, and not find a compromise, the relationship is doomed to failure. Balanced couples always have constructive dialogues.
  9. If you and your boyfriend do not sit in cozy evenings with a bottle of wine, discussing plans for the future, we can assume that there is no love. Strong ties mean constant discussions and desires, common dreams.
  10. Symbiotic attachment is characterized by a complete dissatisfaction with one's own needs, even the most elementary ones. At this time, the needs of the vampire partner are fully realized.

Important! It should be emphasized that the actions a la “I love you!”, Performed at the beginning of a relationship, are the norm. In this case, people are still getting used to each other, so attachment is not considered painful, dependent. The main difference is that a lover finds a place in his life for connection, while an attached partner replaces his own being with new relationships.

Attachment has a detrimental effect on the human essence. When a girl experiences violent feelings towards a man, she forgets about herself. This is where problems with personal growth (spiritual and material) begin, apathy and uncertainty appear.

Method number 1. Find a passion

  1. Hobbies are the most powerful tool that allows you to a short time find peace of mind. Go to nature, sit down and think about what you dreamed about long years? Have you wanted to go to the gym for a long time, but did not have enough money? Take the savings set aside for the next present to your partner, go in for sports.
  2. Haven't been on vacation in over a year? Get together with your friends, go to Europe for a week. Set goals for yourself, don't stop there. Start attending a Spanish or English course, these languages ​​are the world's leading spoken and written languages.
  3. An excellent option for distraction and complete concentration on yourself is the choice of an active hobby. This includes absolutely everything: snowboarding, skiing, skating, cycling, karting, climbing, swimming. If you consider yourself to be brave, jump with a parachute or a rope.
  4. Live in your pleasure, take care of your own well-being, learn to invest in the future. Sign up for popular courses, it can be manicure and pedicure, cutting and sewing, photography and woodcarving courses.
  5. At this stage, your main task is to think about yourself and fill the day to the maximum. If you get very tired, thoughts about a man will begin to fade into the background.
  6. Gather with friends more often, visit cinemas, bowling, water park. Make it a habit to regularly go for walks, go out of town for barbecues, go on excursions.

Method number 2. Get a pet

  1. As mentioned earlier, attachment is driven by the fear of being alone. The girl directs all her love, tenderness and care to the man, forgetting about her own needs. To avoid a disastrous outcome of events, get a pet.
  2. The choice depends on individual preferences. A dog takes time, care and patience. A cat can be at home alone, she also needs affection and constant care. If we talk about parrots, they are cheerful, talkative and unpretentious.
  3. A new companion will save you from loneliness, especially at first, which is what you want to achieve. It is important to direct feelings to those who need it. In this case, you will not lose yourself, gaining peace of mind.

Method number 3. Travel more

  1. Ask your boss for a vacation. Spend it not with a young man, but with friends or colleagues. You can also go abroad in splendid isolation.
  2. Consider beach resorts if you haven't swum in the sea for a long time. Lovers of sights and small streets are advised to purchase sightseeing tours.
  3. You don’t need to invest all your money on vacation, just choose a last-minute ticket on the Internet, pack your suitcase 3 hours before departure and hit the road.
  4. Many girls do not have a foreign passport. In this case, go on a mini-tour of the cities of your country. Visit distant relatives, visit friends in a neighboring city.
  5. Take a camera, take a lot of pictures, print them out when you arrive and decorate the walls. At this stage, the main task is to search for new experiences and inspiration.

Method number 4. Analyze thoughts

  1. Take up meditation. Take a hot herbal bath, turn on soothing music, close your eyes and relax. Think about what exactly you want to receive from a partner? Many people cannot interpret their own thoughts, which is considered a serious omission.
  2. If you are in harmony with the mind, the answer will not be long in coming. A girl attached to a man fills the spiritual emptiness with the current relationship. She is looking for any ways of dependence, sending herself into chains voluntarily.
  3. Such an attitude towards a man does not characterize love. Try to fill in the gaps in the other available ways described above. Fight apathy, do not go on about uncertainty and boredom.
  4. Many girls want to break up with a man, but cannot do it. In such situations, addiction requires the intervention of a qualified specialist.

Method number 5. take care of yourself

  1. It's time to take care of your appearance. Go to the mirror, evaluate the figure, hairstyle, makeup, smile and posture. Are you satisfied with everything? Maybe you don’t like the lack of proper hair and nail care? Or do you not like the condition of the skin, extra folds at the waist? It's time to fix the situation!
  2. Sign up for a gym or a sports school. Consider interesting sections (again, as a hobby). Valid directions are Latin American dances, breathing exercises, stretching, martial arts, swimming pool, yoga.
  3. Review your wardrobe. Throw in the trash or give friends those things that do not sit well. Get rid of old shoes, bags, cosmetics. Choose a beautiful outfit, sexy lingerie, high heels. Such small purchases will inspire you and make you feel like a woman.
  4. Pay attention to the perfume you use. It should not be repulsive and harsh. Give preference to light, barely perceptible aromas. Tidy up your hair, recolor your hair, change the image.
  5. It is important to understand that investing in your appearance will remind you of old days when you lived only for yourself. You should always have a bit of selfishness so as not to infringe on your own interests. Make the most of your time by shopping every month.

It is quite difficult to get rid of attachment to a person if it is caused nearby. psychological aspects. To begin with, analyze your own thoughts, learn to say goodbye to people. Invest in your spiritual component, watch your appearance. Develop financially, get a pet, travel more.

Video: how to overcome attachment to another person

Guys and girls don't know how get rid of attachment to a person and what actually needs to be done to forget a person. Often people use some ineffective methods and end up back in attachment again and can't do anything about it.

In the article, psychologists will tell you how to get rid of affection for a person what and how to do this in order to forget a person once and for all and not be attached to him. After all, getting used to a person happens quickly, and weaning, oddly enough, is rather slow and not pleasant.

Do something you love

To forever get rid of attachment to a person and not only, you need to find a great favorite thing for yourself and do it all your life. This will allow you to remain happy, enjoying every day and no longer be attached to anything and no one, except for your favorite business. Be a free person and find something in life that you are always ready to do and at the same time not only receive money, but also pleasure and joy.

Communicate with other people too

If you are too attached to a person of the opposite sex, to a friend or girlfriend, then the only way to get rid of and get rid of attachment to a person is to start communicating with many people. When your attention and energy is concentrated on one person, then, accordingly, a large part of you is in the person to whom you are attached. Having started communicating with a large number of people, you will divide your energy into parts, which will allow you to no longer become attached to anyone, since your energy, thoughts, are scattered on all people, and not on one. Find out: what to talk about with a guy and a man.

Find your joy in life

Frequent causal affection there is a lack of happiness and joy. We become attached to those who bring us joy and happiness. To get rid of attachment to a person, find your own joy in life without the help of others, then you will not need anyone to feel happiness and joy. You need to communicate with people, but, feeling inside yourself happiness and joy independent of others, you will never be upset and suffer.

Find another love

If you are attached to a guy or girl and you can’t get rid of it, then don’t do it, keep dating. But if a person does not reciprocate and your feelings do not make sense, then you should find the person who likes you, and he likes you. This will allow you to get rid of one person and become attached to the one who is attached to you, then your relationship will never fall apart and will last forever.

Learn to relax and meditate

Become more cheerful

You need to start smiling more often, laughing and enjoying life, because it is not eternal. Attachment is connected with the fact that you are not able to please and amuse yourself. Learn to do this and then you will get rid of attachment to a person and everything else. After all, everything you need to be successful and happy life stored inside us, in the subconscious. Learn to communicate with yourself and then you will always be in good mood and you will be attached to yourself and not to others.

But remember, by nature, all people are interconnected by thin threads and tied to each other by strong and powerful ropes of common energy, so it makes no sense to live alone, communicate, help your neighbor, love, appreciate and respect everyone around you, then you will notice that that it is your environment that changes as soon as you change.

Getting used to a person is a process that happens incredibly quickly, while weaning is characterized by long period time and pain. Attachment, which psychologists also call, can disrupt the perception of reality, deprive a person of will. This feeling seems to bind and hold a person, completely depriving him of independence. Losing connection in the process of parting, a person seems to lose support, it is time to regain autonomy. Today we propose to talk about how to get rid of attachment to a man after breaking up with him.

Causes of emotional dependence

Before we move on to ways to get rid of attachment, we suggest talking about what addiction is, for what reasons it occurs. This term means dependence on a love subject. According to statistics, addiction occurs among both men and women. You can get out of this state only if you can understand it. real reasons. These include the following factors:

  • dislike in childhood;
  • strict parental control;
  • lack of ability and desire to make decisions;
  • intimate harassment experienced in childhood;
  • low self-esteem;
  • fear of loneliness;
  • obsession with one's own shortcomings and downplaying the merits;
  • mental trauma;
  • unpreparedness for a mature relationship;
  • desire to obey.

So how to overcome all these problems, how to get rid of excessive attachment to a man? Let's try to figure it out!

Fighting attachment

The state of attachment to the person you love is like nirvana, this feeling gives true pleasure. And of course, it is just as difficult to part with this feeling as with a loved one. When parting, there is a feeling of loss of oneself and the unbearable pain of loss. Is it possible to stop being attached and try to become a self-sufficient person? Psychologists say: you can protect yourself, preserve your own individuality and get rid of addiction. Experts give a number of tips that will help not only overcome the feeling of attachment, but also prevent depression, which can cause a break with a partner.

Close the door to the past

The first thing to do after you break up with a person is to accept the fact that the past, no matter how beautiful and rosy it may be, cannot be returned. It is necessary to let go of it, to cross it out, to accept the breakup of relations as a given. Psychologists say that over time, you will even like the feeling of freedom, independence.

More communication

Answering the question of how to get rid of attachment to a man, psychologists say: any concentration on specific person always leads to addiction. Addiction can be overcome only by communicating with different people. In this case, your thoughts and feelings will be shared among everyone with whom you spend time. New people are always new opinions, vivid emotions and new information. Such communication will certainly broaden your horizons and allow you to look at many things from a completely different perspective. Of course, it is impossible to talk about new relationships in an attempt to get rid of love experiences, but the void that has formed inside must be filled.

Cheerfulness

How to get rid of attachment to a man? In psychology, there is one effective tool: you need to tune in a positive way. Always look to the future with hope for the best, but be prepared for different options development of events. You should not be afraid of failures and difficulties. Each victory over life circumstances brings an experience that will make you stronger and wiser. Be sure to find joyful feelings inside yourself, often release them to freedom. Psychologists say: you can learn to enjoy everything, even good weather. If life does not spoil you with pleasant events, organize them yourself! Fill your every day with miracles and happy moments, laugh more, entertain yourself. Over time, you will definitely get used to smiling.

Meditation

Love has passed, relationships have ended, people have dispersed, but the habit of seeing loved one stays around for a long time. How to get rid of painful attachment to a man who has become a stranger? Relationship psychology recommends learning to meditate and pray. Thanks to the acquisition of such skills, you will learn to relax, feed yourself with energy and strength on your own. That is, you no longer have to look for people who will share their energy with you.

Hobby

Psychologists say: having rediscovered himself, a person not only ceases to become attached to people, but also becomes a person - self-sufficient, interesting to others. How to discover something new in yourself? You need to develop talents and try extreme sports. Be sure to find a hobby, a hobby that can occupy not only your hands, but also your head. Over time, you will learn to enjoy crafts or sports, collecting items, or cooking. This will gradually weaken your painful attachment to a man. Try yourself as a volunteer, do charity work. Look around: the world is full of people and animals that are experiencing difficulties. Helping those who are weaker will make you feel strong and needed.

Change of activity

An environment in which everything reminds you of an ex-partner will not allow you to get rid of addiction as quickly as you would like. In the same way, you will be affected traditional activities, the rituals that you performed together day after day. What to do? How to get rid of attachment to a man and everything that was connected with him? Change your habits! If before you got up at seven in the morning, had breakfast together and drove to work, start getting up half an hour earlier, go for a run or do exercises, completely change the menu. It's time for bold experiments in your life. And by the way, do not forget to remove everything from your home that evokes memories of the past: gifts and photographs, things that you purchased together. Good idea for a renovation.

Search for impressions

At the moment of separation and for some time after it, only your ex-man is the source of your pleasant memories. How to get rid of emotional attachment to him? New emotions can be a source of inspiration: do something that you have never done before, this will give you food for thought in the near future. You can visit another country, sign up for home economics classes, start dancing or doing needlework.

All these activities will help you get distracted, increase your self-esteem, change the direction of your thoughts. Besides active life will surely bring a lot of new acquaintances, one of them can become fateful. Psychologists say: if you didn’t manage to build a relationship with your ex-man, it means that your loved one is waiting for you somewhere ahead. Do not waste your energy on fruitless memories, save time and do not live in the past.

Lack of aggression

Speaking about how to get rid of attachment to a man, it should be said about the desire to take revenge on the offenders. Remember: these thoughts bind you even more tightly to your former partner. In no case do not think about how bad he is and how he will pay for his actions. Cut off all emotional ties. In no case do not engage in such stupid things as petty dirty tricks: do not spread gossip about him among your friends. The fact is that in the first place it can become a stone in your garden, because it was you who have been with this scoundrel for a long time. Do you want to tell him about all the wrongs he has done? Do it, however, not in person, but on paper. Write a letter telling your ex-man whatever you think of him. Write and then burn.

Plans for life

Sometimes, being in a relationship, women draw for themselves beautiful fairy tale about how their life will be arranged. Even seeing any inconsistencies, they manage to adjust reality to fit their own scenario. That is why the feeling of irritation is so strong when something goes wrong. Of course, thoughts of separation and depression were hardly part of the original plans. That is why women have questions: “How will I live without him?”, “How to get rid of attachment to a man?”. Psychologists give the answer to questions: you will live magnificently and happily. The main thing - remember that happiness does not come to the young ladies, whose eyes are swollen from tears, offended and angry. Continue to make plans for life after a breakup - despite the worries and depression. Be sure to believe that your true happiness will take place!

When we fall in love or a person becomes very dear to us, a feeling of affection often arises. This feeling of intimacy and devotion, the desire to be always and everywhere together, caused by strong sympathy and positive emotions. On the one hand, there is nothing wrong with him, at least exactly as long as you have the opportunity to be with this person. But if for some reason you can’t be together anymore or it has begun to turn into an obsession, a dangerous addiction, then it’s time for your own good and the good of a person dear to you to get rid of it.

Very strong feeling- attachment to a person how to get rid of such a powerful emotional state? First of all, learn to seize the moment. As soon as you feel the urge to see the subject of your addiction, try to distract yourself by focusing on the present moment. Look around, see how deep of blue color sky, take a deep breath of autumn air, look at the strings of yellow foliage passing by. You are where you are and that's great.

Do not fantasize and do not run away in thoughts of a long past time, be here and now.

The second step is to find and define your true desires. It often happens that we try to satisfy some desires through completely different ways. What do you really want? Why do you need this particular person? Perhaps you lack fun, happiness, attention. And therefore, to the first person who comes across who brings these emotions into your life, a feeling of affection arises. But you can be cheerful and happy regardless of others if you become a self-sufficient person.

At this moment, it will be great to do what you love. If you don’t have some huge and all-consuming hobby in your life, then it’s time to find it. Doing what you love will make you happy and free. The best choice would be if this activity can not only give you pleasure and joy, but also bring financial income.

In a situation of strong attachment, meditation can also help, so a few yoga sessions will not hurt. If yoga does not suit you, then you can sign up for fitness, aerobics, Pilates and any other classes, go jogging in the morning. This will help to throw all those unnecessary thoughts out of your head and spend excess free time with health benefits.

Next, you should communicate with other people. If your social circle is limited to one person, then the feeling of affection is quite logical and inevitable. Therefore, you can avoid it by expanding your social circle, getting to know new people. This will help spread your energy and focus among several people rather than just one person.

Do not forget that a change of scenery helps in many situations, including affection. So pack your bags and go on vacation. If this is not possible, go to visit friends, visit your parents. Rearrange or freshen up the apartment with a facelift. In general, change the bored environment.

It will be great if you can say goodbye to all the things and places that connected you with this person. Such an escape will greatly speed up the process of release from addiction.

Quite often, having got into such a situation, people change not only their circumstances, but also their image. Of course, this is not a mandatory requirement and is only appropriate if you have already thought about it. Then we can assume that it is difficult to find a more suitable time.

Be cheerful and positive, do not fall into the depths of depression. Treat yourself to small pleasures. Always remember that every day in your life is a holiday. Do not lock yourself in, do not imprison yourself in your fortress of loneliness. People are by nature collective beings. Keep laughing, love, respect others.

A well-known proverb says that a wedge is knocked out with a wedge. Therefore, a new love or affection will save you from an old relationship. But is this the only way out? It's up to you to decide. Everyone has their own understanding of happiness and pleasure.

If you are frantically typing “attachment to a person how to get rid of” in a browser search engine, then do not think that you will find a panacea or recipes that will relieve you of attachment in one evening. This doesn't happen. It will take time to fully heal from attachment. You may even need the help of a psychologist.

The key to this is determination. If you have decided for yourself that you do not need this attachment, then, as with any addiction, you can always say goodbye to it. Only by getting rid of attachment will you have absolute freedom.

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