The funniest horoscope ever. Table entertainment for any occasion
IN ONE DUTCH WOMEN'S MAGAZINE I stumbled upon SUCH A FUNNY HOROSCOPE.
I WANTED TO INTRODUCE YOU WITH THESE IDEAS, BUT IN THE PROCESS OF READING I WAS SURPRISED MYSELF… AND THERE IS A LOT OF COINCIDENCE…?!
LOOK FOR YOURSELF, MAYBE YOU WILL SEE THIS AMAZING?
Aries is the first sign of the Zodiac, the most lively and energetic. Astrology textbooks describe Aries as a charming, energetic personality, endowed with charisma, a born leader and revolutionary. He quickly rushes through life, radiating cheerfulness and optimism.
The truth is that this is an overbearing, self-centered twat, interested only in himself and having an exorbitantly inflated self-importance.
In Aries, Mars endows a person with courage, determination, energy, passion and ambition, as well as short temper, selfishness and impulsiveness. The typical Aries flies through life at full steam, challenging anyone who stands in his way. Endowed with fearlessness by nature, he calmly rushes into battle, even with an obviously strong opponent. If you are not lucky and you fall under his feet, then you will fully experience for yourself what an annoyed Aries is: angry, red, he screams and can even stomp his feet, or even rush with his fists. Sometimes, suddenly, for no apparent reason, he can show generosity and, for example, leave his partner empty-handed. Most of all, he is afraid of being branded as ignoble!
He is stung by a condescending attitude, he will not forgive this and, on occasion, can take revenge painfully. Although by nature not so vindictive. 
Aries does not reason for a long time, he simply reacts to irritants, he first acts, and then thinks, often in the heat of the moment destroying his own happiness, because he has no time to collect facts and think ...
Not one iota of humility, he will never admit his mistakes! It is impossible to wait for words of apology from him.
You start arguing with him and a flurry of screams and insults will fall upon you, if you prove you are right, you will be offended like a child and go to pout in a corner. Aries is typical complete absence taste in clothes, they simply have no time to do it, they are more attracted to moving objects ... They especially adore cars.
What is characteristic, in love they are disinterested ...
CALF. (April 20-May 20) 
Taurus is the second sign of the Zodiac. Traditional astrology kindly describes Taurus as reliable, picky eaters, frugal homebody, lover of good food and magic in the kitchen. A born boss and a person capable of managing the World.
But in real life you have to deal with a stubborn, edifying, boring curmudgeon with a weight problem.
At the word Taurus or a bull, in the imagination of people, an image of a large animal appears, peacefully chewing grass, blinking with satisfaction with its large shiny eyes. He is even ready to let you scratch him behind the ears ... But if you want to pick a couple of leaves on his field, you will get such a storm!
Whichever of the Taurus you communicate with, whether it be a man or a woman, you will quickly recognize his character. His fury is capable of awakening such a beast in him in an instant that you will regret in an instant that bullfighting has been canceled in your country!
His eyes fill with anger, he even darkens his face, everyone's lower jaw protrudes at least a little, but they subconsciously tilt their heads and look at you frowningly., just like a bull before an attack ....
Taurus is ruled by the planet Venus, and it is she who endows him with insatiability.
Simple approval is never enough for Taurus, property is always scarce, food is not enough, rest and sex are always not in full measure ... They are emotional, but not intellectual, they take hard work and diligence from childhood. They do not know how to grasp a thought on the fly, but if they have learned something, then it is for life. Because of this, many of them do not complete their education, or leave it halfway ... the craving for pleasure is too great. But if they have already learned, then rest assured, you won’t find a better careerist ... They love to sit at all sorts of meetings, meetings, join parties, unions and very quickly become leaders in them ... Although everyone will whisper behind his back that he is a scoundrel, a dictator, usurper… 
They are not able to listen to the opinion of another person, therefore neither logic nor reasonable arguments act on them. If you start arguing with him, then you will have the feeling that you are hitting your forehead against the wall, and if it turns out that you are right, he will look at you as if you were an alien. A great sense of style and beauty attracts people to him, but they are often lonely due to their difficult nature, prone to sexual perversions, such as homosexuality. Both men and women often suffer from an inferiority complex due to their weight, and therefore sometimes they allow themselves sharp antics, but they just want to eat.
Many Taurus can never give up bad habits, smoking, drugs, alcohol, they like to be late ... Usually very good parents, but they love to pamper their children.
Gemini is the third sign of the Zodiac. Astrologers unanimously convince us that Gemini are energetic, versatile people, endowed with a mass of talents, charming intellectuals, able to solve several problems at the same time and very fond of communication.
In fact, being close to the Gemini is like getting a job in a crazy house, surprises and various dirty tricks will constantly await you.
They are not smart, but crafty, cunning and resourceful, more talkers than philosophers. They think fast and strangely, the main goal in their life is to become famous and, in turn, get to know all the celebrities around.
Their element is meetings, cocktails, presentations, where the famous public gathers and talks about the high .... Although their knowledge of everything is superficial, they pretend that they understand everything and in every field of art they are the most subtle connoisseurs and specialists. Their patron is Mercury, a swift god with wings on his sandals! He carries them with lightning speed from one place to another, and the element air is impermanence itself.
Gemini cannot be persuaded, they are very stubborn, but they give out their stubbornness for the breadth of mind and independence. They do not delve into life, but, as it were, glide over the surface. A point of view other than their own is always wrong in their eyes, they know for sure that they are right! 
In marriage, this is the most unfaithful and fickle partner, new people attract them with freshness and incomprehensibility, they are instantly fascinated, they suffer greatly from unrequited love, but they can be comforted in a quarter of an hour, seeing something new on the horizon. They can meticulously ask a person about something, without even delving into the essence of his answers and explanations. They have wonderful feeling taste and style, they know how to dress beautifully and wear jewelry, but they always think that the neighbor on the landing looks better and start copying her, because they have two faces, they are constantly changing ...
Envy, a passion for gossip and intrigue, a constant change of mood and point of view ... makes Gemini unreliable partners, they always have enemies, they are especially capable of delivering a lot of suffering to Capricorns, Virgos, Taurus and Scorpios ... But they fall in love with them and remain faithful to them all their lives , people much more deserving than they are ... just these victims were caught in the net of their charm. Gemini is always thin, food does not give them such satisfaction, as, for example, good music, declaration of love, poetry, walk in the woods.
CANCER. (June 21-July 22) 
Cancer, the fourth sign of the Zodiac, lives in the House of Home, Private Life. Satisfying astrology describes Cancer as a person who loves solitude, caring and completely devoted to family and friends.
The truth is that Cancers are slippery, manipulative creatures and demand, in turn, absolute loyalty from loved ones.
All watermarks sensitive and emotional, but Cancer is just a champion of emotional instability. Cancer is ruled by the Moon, and it changes daily, the mood of Cancers is ebb and flow, only accelerated many times over. Polite Cancer can calmly get nasty, insult and very often ready for treason, but you are unlikely to know about it, he is secretive and deceitful.
Cancer is able to joke, laugh and get angry or offended and cry at the same time. He loves to retire, attack and immediately complain and whine ...
He has several points of view on the same question and all, by the way, are true, he does not hold stubbornness, but he is not going to argue with you, he will simply remain silent and do it his own way. 
Sharp and unexpected movements frighten him, they even startle, they love smoothness and softness, insects and reptiles frighten him.
Cancers do not argue, they are offended ...
Weepy.
Making Cancer look at himself objectively is an unrealistic task. In a dispute, Cancer will be the first to be silent, but this does not mean that he lost, do not hold out your hands to him, he can chop it off with his claw. Cancer loves junk, antiques, all Cancers are very religious, and for real. Great intuition makes them a little visionary in the eyes of other people, excellent parents, but dubious partners ... especially Cancer men love to live in two families and have illegitimate children, and others often find out about this only after their death. Cancer women are rarely seen 
s in society, usually they are quiet mothers of families or middle-class officials, but this does not mean anything, if Cancer got a job somewhere, he will always find a loophole how to illegally make himself an increase in salary. They love to work where it smells like money.
Leo is the fifth sign of the zodiac. He lives in the house of creativity and love. Any book on astrology will tell you that Lions are people proud, confident, fun-loving, loyal, generous, elegant. Most likely these books were written by an astrologer - Leo. 
In fact, Lions crave to always be in the spotlight, powerful fanatics of their own "I", whose infantilism and selfishness are exceeded only by their desire to dispose of others.
The Sun controls Leo, and just as it is the center of our System, Leo (or Lioness) considers himself the center around which everyone must revolve. Of course, they crave explicit worship, but sometimes it is enough for them that you personally consider him to be the main thing in everything.
Lions are either loud, unceremonious and cheeky or sly quiet with self-respect.
Sometimes he can just pretend to be a humble quiet person for some time, but do not be deceived, there are no shy and shy Lions in nature. Their constant need for attention often makes them sullen, and when they lose contact with their Self, they become selfish tyrants, especially with age, believing that their whole life is a vale of suffering. In fact, they roar inflict suffering on others, not at all embarrassed by this. 
Instead of building relationships with people, they plague them with jealousy and reproaches, try to argue with them and you will hear just a roar instead of arguments.
Win an argument with him, he will stop talking, stare at you and go into the shadows, contemplate the next attack.
Lions make the most devoted sissies. They easily part with their first spouse, although later they often regret it all their lives.
From Lionesses, fanatical mothers are obtained, with great pleasure poisoning the life of daughters-in-law.
Virgo is the sixth sign of the Zodiac and lives in the House of Services and Health. Astrologers tactfully depict Virgo as modest, practical, sweet, logical, picky and meticulous. 
However, looking closely, you will find a restless, fussy, petty, prone to endless analysis and subjective assessments of a critic and a hypocrite.
Virgo is ruled by Mercury, the same planet that rules the restless Gemini. However, in Virgo, restless Mercury is trapped in the element of Earth, where he becomes critical and irritable.
Virgos might dream of being as spontaneous as Gemini, but they are too firmly on the ground.
Virgos get worried about everything.
They heal the sick, save sinners, correct speech errors, and dispense unsolicited advice with the dignity of an elementary school teacher.
Virgos are very cautious and absolutely devoid of adventurism. They are so busy improving those around them that they are completely oblivious to their own character, which is by no means pleasant.
Of all the signs, Virgos are the least able to admit their mistakes. Born under the motto, THERE IS NO PERFECTION IN THE WORLD!, they cannot relax and enjoy life. 
All the fantasies and dreams of the Virgo have an absolutely practical purpose, the Virgo does nothing without benefit for herself, and if she gave you something, it means that she just got a bigger piece the other day.
Virgo can get a job in any organization, even in Horns and Hooves, and calmly have her own piece of bread with butter and caviar there. Most of all, they fear for their health, therefore, whatever, Virgo will not eat, if necessary, they will calmly lose weight or quit smoking, they do not tell anyone, even themselves, the whole truth.
Always on the sidelines, they know how to drag chestnuts out of the fire with the wrong hands. Virgo, possessing the gift of persuasion, can convince anyone that a new enterprise is simply necessary; for herself, she has long calculated dividends.
They are constant in marriage, because disorder in everything affects the Virgin oppressively.
Virgo is obsessed with accuracy, they are easy to recognize by appearance always neatly dressed and combed. Men often marry very late or even remain bachelors, because Virgo, firstly, is never bored alone, and secondly, Virgo men are happy to do housework.
This sign both in the Zodiac and in life embodies the variability of life and the constancy of change.
Astrologers endow him with the highest harmony, they argue that Libra is always impartial, diplomatic and always strive for peace, that they have been looking for truth, beauty and a perfect life partner all their lives.
In fact, behind their somewhat cloying smiles, there are lovers of pampering themselves, Beloved, people indulging only their whims in everything, their hearing is tuned only to the ringing of coins, and there is no more individuality and grandeur in them than in a green leaf.
Libra is ruled by Venus, but it is in Libra that she endows a person with an endless thirst for improvement. They need to become the first, they are never satisfied, either with themselves or with a partner.
As one of the dominant cardinal signs, Libra views dissent as a personal affront.
They get angry even if you just switch the TV to another channel.
In the representation of Libra, the harmony of the world lies in the fact that everyone agrees with them. Libras are very subjective, not judgmental. They recognize one opinion - their own.
If you start arguing with them, they will explode with anger, but they can easily ask you for forgiveness, because they are afraid of power. 
All Libras always have at least some kind of inferiority complex. For women, this is either weight, or height, or not too smooth skin, for men it’s even worse, even a beautiful wife will not help him stop being tormented by suffering about the fact that someone else can be better ...
Marrying and marrying Libra only by calculation, if the calculation turns out to be incorrect, they often do not have the courage to get a divorce and harass their partner with nit-picking, sometimes destroying him as a person.
In their hearts they are cowardly and shouting is enough for them, but they are offended for life ... Geniuses in love and very often start romances with married and married people, because to beat someone off, what could be more pleasant? You can not ask them for a loan ... they will not give it. In the upbringing of children, complete ignoramuses, sometimes pamper, sometimes demand impossible obedience, as a rule, their children grow up indecisive and always look back at their parents, although Libra themselves are always naughty and spiky in childhood. But they are capable of generous and broad gestures, this charms people, they often say about Libra: A wonderful person!
SCORPION(October 23-November 21) 
Scorpio, the eighth sign of the Zodiac, lives in the House of death, sex, and other people's possessions.
Conventional astrology describes Scorpio as a passionate being, full of secrets, sensual, endowed with the gift of being reborn and rising from the ashes, like a Phoenix.
But he would be better compared to Dracula rising from a coffin.
These are people obsessed with obsessive ideas, very secretive, prone to assault subjects who feed their pride on the humiliation of others.
Scorpio is ruled by two planets. From Mars, the god of war, conflict and aggression, he is endowed with suspicion, and his outward friendliness is separated from seething poisonous emotions by only a thin layer of skin.
The second planet Pluto, the god of extremes, instills in him an unsurpassed survival instinct in any situation. Neither Aspen stake, nor holy water - nothing can harm Scorpio, only he himself can hit him. What Scorpio usually does at the end of life.
Scorpio rarely lives his life happily, usually his unbridled fantasy and instinct of the owner push him to make an erroneous fateful decision.
But notice, no one, but only he himself, does himself a dirty trick.
His favorite game in life is the Inquisition Bonfire, If you die you're innocent, if you stay alive you're guilty.
They deliberately cause harm to loved ones, as a rule, their marriages are not durable, especially the first ones, not very 
There are not many people who can withstand their character. After all, everything in this world, in his opinion, is not worthy of him, he is the best in everything, the richest, the most successful, they are naturally endowed with longevity, good health and exorbitant self-admiration.
They have such a developed intuition that they see people on 
through. Very believing. Perhaps the most faithful of all signs.
If you leave him with a snort, he will never forgive you, Scorpios are very vengeful, they don’t forget anything and never forgive.
They love to be late everywhere and hate it when others are late for them. As a rule, they are very quick-tempered and in the heat of the moment they speak without thinking, often pugnacious and never give in. Sometimes they are capable of a grand gesture, but here 
they will ask for something in return.
Their motto is: All or nothing!
If they get divorced, then by all means they try to annoy the former and with great reluctance pay alimony.
Greedy beef and all the money in the world is always not enough for them.
Sagittarius is the ninth sign of the Zodiac and lives in the House of philosophy, adventure and long-distance travel.
Traditionally, representatives of this sign are described as sociable, merry, honest people having philosophical view on life and events in the world, passionate travelers.
However, the harsh truth is that this is a tactless subject, stomping through life with one foot stuck in a bucket, a bawler and a bully, always speaking out of place. 
Sagittarius is controlled by the cheerful joker Jupiter, and he endows his wards with a restless character and extravagance.
Sagittarians never know how to count money and easily part with it, their breadth of soul is sometimes even burdensome, they have a lot of friends around the world, they charm so much from the first meeting that this person is immediately remembered and immediately put forward somewhere.
Becoming a leader or director is a trifle for Sagittarius, but he will often not work, because his job is to travel around, make incendiary speeches and sit on the presidium. All Sagittarians, both men and women, firmly believe that they know everything in the world and spend their time to enlighten humanity, mired in ignorance.
They do not know how to act subtly, they need everything to be done immediately.
They neigh very loudly or smile lusciously, but under the mask of a cheerful jester hides a restrained rage, and what a rage!
Because they have to suppress their anger, there are many violent criminals among them.
In general, angry Sagittarians do not even try to curb their feelings. 
They are born in the dark season, when the days are the shortest and the nights are the longest and their soul is often twilight, they suffer from bouts of melancholy, they want to constantly fiesta.
Favorite entertainment is the circus, they love loud music, so there are so many artists, singers, musicians among them.
Sagittarius women are completely delighted with shiny jewelry, even cheap jewelry. The lack of sunlight makes them lovers of bright clothes. Sagittarians love to quarrel with relatives, both close and distant, and in their families they have frequent conflicts, while they happen, yell, and then they can calmly make peace and talk in an hour as if nothing had happened.
They are very emotional, capricious, fickle.
Easily change in marriage. They don’t know how to argue, and if you start proving your point of view, then your centaur will quickly jump over the fence and run away for fresh clover.
As a rule, Sagittarius women always have many children, not at all because they are good mothers, they are just too lazy. 
to be protected and they make a decision with lightning speed: Oh, let there be one more child! Although, having given birth, they immediately try to nurse the baby to someone, they plow their husband, mother, distant relatives and neighbors, they love five-day days, because for them to go to work is a vacation, and, instead of running home after work to the children, it may well go and listen to a lecture on how to care for orchids, even though she doesn't have any orchids.
Sagittarians are simply born for public assignments: the head of the house, combatants, a fireman, a stewardess, a Moscow-Vladivostok carriage conductor - what could be more pleasant?
Magnanimous astrologers describe this person as a traditionalist, a determined and purposeful person, a very selective person, with good taste and a sense of style.
It would be possible not to try with the description, replacing it with one word careerist.
If you are dealing with Capricorn, then you will definitely suffer from his imperiousness, pomposity, these people squeeze the Civil Code in one hand, and the marriage contract in the other.
Capricorn is ruled by Saturn, and here he endows him with dogmatism and makes him purely business-like. Capricorn women, if they did not make a career themselves, then they brought their weak-willed husbands to the people, and they were not given anything else. 
All Capricorns are born with a manic desire to be first in their flock. Although the fish tail in his sign indicates a wet and emotional nature. They are sensitive and cry often. But their tears are rarely seen, they are not sugary sentimental like Pisces.
The manifestation of emotions is considered not decent, but they are hot natures.
More than anything, they love to talk about how hard they worked and tried to reach their position. Although by nature they are generally tongue-tied and it is tiring to listen to them, they do not have a flight of thought and fantasy, like Pisces and Gemini, they have everything naked truth. They also lack a sense of humor. 
Capricorns are very serious and lack immediacy. Very often, women and men born under this sign marry early, although they themselves do not understand why?
They think very little about love, they are interested in material values, but in their youth it seems to them: It's time, it's time to start a family, I'm already an adult (th)
Namely, they think about the family, not about love.
In pretty young age achieve material success, and having achieved it, they understand that life is boring. They don’t know how to rejoice, so all Capricorns have a very responsible hobby, if it doesn’t exist, then only their favorite JOB!
And only this brings him happiness, he has an excuse for all the moaning of his partner: I'm busy! Money for Capricorn is an end in itself.
In general, these are boring subjects who are usually appreciated when they are suddenly not around. They take great care of their health, chronic centenarians.
According to the Bible, Jesus was a Capricorn, but by all indications, He certainly was a FISH, a kind pacifist... But Capricorns love to fight to the end, they are very stubborn and persistent.
If you win the argument, then it is likely that your phone will ring at night, Capricorn decided to offer you a counterargument ...
Aquarius is the eleventh sign of the Zodiac, and benevolent astrology describes him as an individualist, self-confident, original and idealistic, who treats all people equally.
To you, he is more likely to seem like an obsessive eccentric who begins to tell the first person he meets about his bizarre theories and conclusions.
Bring confusion and confusion, the true purpose of Aquarius. He doesn't even know why he does it. 
Since we have officially entered the Age of Aquarius, this only enhances its qualities. He loves rebellion, and in a peaceful, routine life he feels sleepy, often because of this he has a desire to drink, or smoke ... They are very prone to bad habits.
Aquarius loves to cross the boundaries of morality and break the law.
Aquarius is ruled by two planets - Uranus and Saturn.
Uranus is the planet of sudden change and revolution. Saturn is the planet of dogma and repression. Therefore, Aquarians are not sincere, they create the illusion of change without changing anything, they themselves are terribly afraid of change.
Aquarius people are aloof, not passionate, if you dig deeper, you will notice that they know little, their knowledge is superficial, and in general, they often have nothing to say.
They are all dreaming about the future: when I grow up, when I get married, when I have children, when we save up money, when I retire... And life passes them by, because they do not know how to live in the present.
They don’t even wear clothes right away, they usually hang in their closet for years until they go out of fashion.
Often they are very perceptive and well versed in people, but their trouble is that they can never understand themselves ... Marriages with them fall apart easily, like skittles ... But they are never alone, they will always find someone to charm, and again they are paired …
By old age, their weakest organ is the head, often memory loss, nervous breakdowns. Therefore, if you got Aquarius, take care of him, he does not know how to take care of himself.
Pisces is the twelfth and last sign of the Zodiac, which has absorbed the wisdom of all other signs. Astrology calls them seers, they seem to have descended to earth on a moonbeam, people prone to introspection, sensitively capturing the mood and aura of other people. Good pacifists, they feel sorry for everyone, both people and animals ... 
Scrape the gilding off them and you will find a dreamer overturned by the realities of life, gullible, disorganized, constantly in a state of confusion and completely helpless.
Pisces is controlled by Neptune, the god of illusions, and he endows a person born under this sign with the desire to run away from problems and absolute naivety. They believe everything!
They evaluate each action through the prism of their prejudices, which break any truth.
This makes Pisces champions among losers, but they endure all hardships easily, for the sole reason that, not knowing how to get out of the situation, they resign themselves to it, and the course itself endures them. 
They are not fighters, they don't lay down their weapons, they don't even know how to pick them up!
This makes them remarkably resilient, only far removed from reality.
They have many, many ideas, but the fear of change and the unwillingness to take risks, bends them to the ground and often prevents them from developing their potential, which is huge.
They have a lot of talents and they can do many things better than others, but they are too lazy ...
Ambition is a trait not known to them at all, they may well tell their idea, completely free of charge, to a person who will make capital on this.
But Neptune and God sea element, so Pisces is quick-tempered and hysterical like no other, but after an hour they have already forgotten that they just recently yelled at you, and they start talking, as if nothing had happened, they have a great sense of humor, but sometimes it is a cruel satire.
All Pisces speak first and think later.
But they are certainly interesting people, and what taste, style and charm they have often makes you reconcile and digest their unbearable character. 
They are quick-tempered, but quick-tempered, they talk about themselves, not noticing that they have a lot of enemies.
Pisces themselves are terribly vindictive and do not forgive insults, reminding everyone of this, including offenders, many take this for courage, and this is just sentimental whining. After all, Pisces never take revenge.
In contact with
Classmates
Someone only helplessly throws up his hands when he is angry, while the other is already tearing and rushing about in search of someone who will take this blow not himself. And often it directly depends on the Sign of the Zodiac.
Our horoscope of angry Zodiac Signs is just a joke, but as you know, there is some truth in every joke. Perhaps it will come in handy for you the next time your Capricorn boss loses his temper, or maybe you will take a look at yourself from the outside and with humor.
Aries
Aries is able to get angry in no time. He can flare up, flare up with anger, and in this state he usually resembles an angry bull at a bullfight. Fortunately, Aries is quite easy-going, despite the fact that this zodiac sign is considered to be stubborn.
Taurus
Taurus is patient, and therefore angry for a long time. Representatives of this sign of the Zodiac can accumulate grievances, bearing them in themselves, and then present them to the offender, moreover, when he does not expect it. Therefore, psychologists advise such people to speak out, and not to keep tension in themselves.
Twins
The twins get angry on a grand scale, not embarrassed in expressions, and if they were angered on purpose, then in the methods of revenge. Fortunately, Geminis are addictive natures, and they usually get distracted from negative emotions for something else.
And rightly so, because there are so many positive and not worth negative emotions around. will tell about it.
Cancer
Angry, Cancer may be offended, sad, or even take the position of the victim. But it is in this situation that the evil Cancer is especially terrible, because, causing others to feel guilty, he is able to bring to repentance his offender, and even someone who is not at all involved in the troubles of Cancer.
a lion
An angry Leo will certainly want to solve the problem, feeling hurt. He can build a grandiose plan for revenge on an enemy, create a multi-stage gossip for a lover of rumors who has stung him.
One "but" - the idea of Leo will be brought to life by those around him, which means that the evil Leo is quite dangerous for his inner circle.
Virgo
Virgo can build insidious revenge plans for a very long time and will definitely remember all the negativity on occasion, since this zodiac sign is quite vindictive. Virgo is able to write a hundred complaints about unscrupulous service and not get tired.
She does not get tired of congratulating her rival on the defeat every year, and many are not in vain advising Virgo to direct all this energy in a useful direction.
Scales
Libra, angry, experience conflicting feelings, and in this their dual nature is manifested in all its glory. Continue to be angry or forgive and let go? Remember everything or delete from life the source of all this negativity? Libra can fluctuate for a very long time, and the outcome of the situation depends on the stage at which Libra gets tired of thinking and decides to act.
Scorpion
Scorpio is the same zodiac sign that, when angry, combines the ingenuity of Gemini, the perseverance of Virgo and the scope of Leo. In revenge or retaliation, Scorpio has no equal. However, when opposing the Universe, it is important to remember the Law of the Boomerang, and not only return the negative to the enemy, but also leave strength for something good for loved ones.
Sagittarius
Sagittarius gets angry unpredictably. Sometimes he can wave his hand and say something like “Come on, buddy, who doesn’t happen to,” although you clearly feel that you are to blame, and have already lost your feet, thinking how to fix the situation.
But at the same time, Sagittarius can remember that once, eight years ago, it was you who drank his yogurt, and remember this for a very long time. True, it is unlikely that Sagittarius will be seriously angry at the same time.
Capricorn
Capricorn gets angry little and rarely, simply because it is very difficult to get Capricorn angry. But if someone managed to shake this bastion of endurance and calmness, it will be very difficult not to fall under the distribution, since Capricorn, like Virgo, has a good memory.
Aquarius
Aquarius is usually angry very violently, whether it is a passer-by who stepped on his foot or universal injustice. But Aquarius rarely comes to retaliatory maneuvers. He prefers to prove by his ill-wisher that he is better, not becoming like competitors or opponents.
Fish
Pisces, as a rule, get angry without action, and can experience resentment again and again. It can be easier for this Zodiac Sign to let go of both the situation and its possible culprit, and move on with life. But if this does not work, the advice of psychologists will help get rid of anger.
Get less angry and smile more often, because a smile and positive prolong life and improve energy.
- Aries (March 21 - April 20): Crazy Level - 30%!
If you go to the mountains with someone, then only with Aries. They are avid extreme sportsmen, besides, they will always give a helping hand to their friend. Aries clearly follow their path and achieve the intended. A lot of plans ripen in their head, which sometimes seem absolutely insane. Their courage and perseverance can only be envied! - Taurus (April 21 - May 21): 40% craziness rate!
Stubbornness - main feature this sign. Taurus will bring anyone to white heat: it is so important for them to prove their case. This makes them look slightly strange in the eyes of other people. Taurus is fully developed, they have kind heart And iron strength will.
- Gemini (May 22 - June 21): Madness Level - 100%!
Most crazy sign zodiac. Geminis are fickle and frivolous, you never know what they have in store for you today. But you will never get bored with them! They have a bunch in stock. incredible stories and a tale from life. Only the Twins are capable of reaching a completely reckless denouement in their adventures.
- Cancer (June 22 - July 22): 90% crazy rate!
Cancers are notorious for their extreme mood swings. They prefer not to get out of the house, but if they break into night club- beware. It is they who, in a state of intoxication, scribble insane messages to the former. You never know what's on Cancer's mind and it drives you crazy!
- Leo (July 23 - August 21): 80% crazy rate!
Representatives of this sign are used to being the center of attention, they love noisy parties and big companies. Lions get drunk quickly, and this loosens their tongue so much that others in their company often have to blush. These people have no brakes, they do not know how to stop in time.
- Virgo (August 22 - September 23): 70% craziness!
Virgo tirelessly works on herself, striving for perfection in everything. Control and power are her main passions. These people are able to noble deeds but they expect recognition for it. Their desire to appear ideal in the eyes of people completely takes possession of them.
- Libra (September 24 - October 23): 30% craziness rate!
Libras are obsessed with finding balance in everything. Sometimes they are ready to go to extremes, especially when it comes to members of the opposite sex. Libra will go to any lengths to get the object of his sigh, even gossip.
- Scorpio (October 24 - November 22): 40% craziness rate!
The statement that Scorpios sting unbearably painfully is true. Of course, they have no equal in resourcefulness and insight, but this still does not brighten up their shortcomings. Scorpio is the most sensual sign of the zodiac, he is a master of beautiful courtship and romantic gestures. His sexual energy is overflowing, so few people manage to cope with this raging stream of passion.
- Sagittarius (November 23 - December 22): 50% craziness level!
Sagittarians proudly carry the banner of justice and truth all their lives. And it is better not to interfere with them! Nothing can anger them so much as the restriction of personal freedom. In addition, Sagittarians easily light up with ideas that sometimes blind their minds.
- Capricorn (December 23 - January 20): 60% crazy rate!
Capricorns are still workaholics! They take on the most difficult tasks on their shoulders and take on their solution with passion. Capricorns are not averse to showing off their intelligence and professionalism. If they are at the head of any business, you should not expect concessions.Capricorns stick to their line, even if they're wrong. This feature extends to personal life: the partner will always be in tight rein. Their madness is to want everything under control.
- Aquarius (January 21 - February 19): 20% craziness rate!
Aquarius is like crazy professor who is used to living in his illusions. It is very easy to wrap around your finger, and people are used to using it. That is why this zodiac sign often becomes a victim of scammers, and simply those who are looking for easy prey.
- Pisces (February 20 - March 20): Insanity Level - 10%!
Pisces are the least crazy of the other zodiac signs. They are calm and peaceful, you can always rely on them. Pisces are ready to sacrifice their interests just to brighten up someone's loneliness. These character traits make them the most reasonable, wise and empathetic.
Of course, a comic horoscope according to the signs of the zodiac has the right to life. Some people believe that such horoscopes are unreliable, however, by reading short sparkling characteristics, they recognize themselves and their friends.
Exactly cool horoscope according to the signs of the zodiac, he calls a spade a spade. Who has a sense of humor, read!
Cool horoscope according to the signs of the zodiac of the element of Fire
The ram is always right, he knows the price of everything, it is easier to shoot him than to argue. Flawlessly honest. If a suit does not suit you or you are overweight, he will honestly tell you about it. In everyday life, it is usually useless, but it generates brilliant ideas to match Sagittarius.
Leo - a cool horoscope for the signs of the zodiac
He divides people into two classes - those close to him and everyone else. An egoist, but he is forgiven for his holy faith in his own impeccability. The best in everything! The marriage partner makes it clear that it came to him along with the status of the lion's chosen one. Unarmed before flattery, with the help of which ropes can be twisted from the Leo zodiac sign.
Sagittarius - a comic horoscope for the zodiac sign
Sagittarius expresses his judgments willingly even when he is advised to hold his tongue. But the mouth of the Sagittarius zodiac sign does not close, because his personal opinion should become the truth for everyone. A lucky sign in life! Sagittarius has a lot of friends who, in which case, will not let him disappear.
Comic horoscope according to the signs of the zodiac of the elements of the Earth
More stubborn than Aries, just stubborn, while not an innovator, boring and greedy. It does not have this charming mutton indifference and. Zodiac sign Taurus is an unsurpassed slow-witted. Lustful. In affections is constant. Distrustful, wary of new people, but will stand up for old friends with his chest.
Virgo - a comic horoscope by zodiac sign
According to statistics, most psychopathic maniacs are born under the zodiac sign of Virgo. These heartless monsters poison with their pedantry, love of law and order the life of everyone who finds themselves on the same territory with them. But in everyday life Virgo is useful like no other.
Capricorn - a cool horoscope about the signs of the zodiac
Happiness comprehends only one way - breaks in like a damned one. The meaning of his life is in his work. At first it seems meek, but at the first opportunity it will give you a tangible poke. Supreme Pleasure receives if this can be done with Leo, whom he cannot stand for arrogance. Leo answers him in the same way, not enduring this dirty trick, and if at the moment of poking Leo is not in the mood, the zodiac sign Capricorn must immediately run away, otherwise things will end badly.
Comic horoscope according to the signs of the zodiac of the air element
Twins
No one realizes how difficult it is for the Gemini zodiac sign to survive in this wide world opportunities! Choice is a Gemini's haunting nightmare. It always seems to them that life is passing by, even if they get bogged down in events.
Libra - a cool horoscope for the signs of the zodiac
Libra imagines themselves to be aesthetes, unreliable, seven Fridays a week, yearning, which is unattainable in principle for the zodiac sign of Libra, because they are in constant dissonance between reality and the desired. Indecisive, and therefore suffer from nervous ailments.
Aquarius - a comic horoscope for the zodiac sign
Looks like it fell from an oak tree. This, oddly enough, many people like it. Even if everything goes wrong in the life of the Aquarius zodiac sign itself, he manages to give out advice that works! Potential criminal. There is no Aquarius without a criminal past, he breaks the law with pleasure and, unlike Gemini, he perfectly understands what he is doing.
Cool horoscope for the signs of the zodiac Water
There is no sign more suspicious than Cancer! He constantly imagines the end of the world, is afraid of his own shadow, falls into hysterics and seeks consolation from the Virgin. Disdain. He annoys others with conversations about his sores, which is why everyone, except for Taurus, scatter in horror. Has a penchant for philosophy and alcoholism. The first, as well as the second, is contraindicated for the zodiac sign Cancer.
Diversify the family holiday and corporate event horoscopes drawn up in a playful handicap will help. With such entertainment you can give good mood to all those present and make a “good forecast” for the coming year.
It so happened that modern man very superstitious. In pursuit of a good life, prosperity, a respected position and family happiness, he often relies on the "will of the stars" and magic. And it's not bad at all!
Psychologically setting yourself up for good changes in, it is quite possible to achieve victories in Everyday life! The main thing is to believe and make an effort. A comic horoscope, unlike the usual one, is composed in a humorous form.
Such astrological forecast may be in prose or verse. Poems, by the way, are more easily and positively perceived by people at an event, at any feast and at any holiday.
The humorous feature gently hint about the shortcomings of a certain zodiac sign and "generously predict" good changes in the coming or coming year. Such "instruction" will surely make every guest present smile and leave him pleasant memories.
IMPORTANT: A comic horoscope, as a rule, is compiled on the basis of a real one created by astrologers. But, it is written in a more understandable language, in simple words and supplemented with wishes.
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Aries men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
As they say, Aries is "still that sheep." And it has its share undeniable truth! In the coming year, Aries will face a number of unpredictable situations that can put the “curls” to a standstill. Be careful, do not rest your horns on difficulties and try to overcome them! Excessive stubbornness is unlikely to help you achieve your desired goals. In the year of the Rat, Aries should relax a little and let go of the situation, as they say, “downstream”. This will allow not only to relax, but to put any business in such a way that it will end with your benefit!
For women:
If the Aries man is a "ram", then the woman is a "Baroness". And it's not just a play on words! In the new year 2020, sheep women will be especially attractive and irresistible. Many of them will find "female happiness", thanks to the perseverance and fury with which they will strive to achieve what they want. In addition, if you have Aries women, have any acting abilities, the horoscope wants you to pretend to be stupid from time to time for the sake of all the same good goals!
In verse:
Aries is a sign of "stubbornness" and arrogance,
Every little thing infuriates them!
To make life "sweet"
On holiday, drink without a trace!
Aries need a lot of space
So that the house is not crowded,
At work, in the garage
And of course in the shower!
New Year meets Aries
With open mind:
Let the barn be full
In the bins of oats with grass!
Horoscope wishes Aries
Be calm and gentle
So that the soul is calm
Life was more fun!
Happy New Year to Aries
Will surely come to the house
A new broom of bad weather
Sweep and take away!
Comic New Year's horoscope 2020 for women and men of Aries: poems Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Taurus men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
Taurus in the new year, like the stubborn Aries, should a little "relax and slow down." It is the excessive tension and the desire to help everyone, everywhere and always, that destroys the restless bulls and heifers, preventing them from getting the desired maximum from life. In the year of the Rat, Taurus will be especially vulnerable to difficulties and problems that arise, both on the love and professional fronts. In order for any outcome of the case to be positive and kind, do not hesitate to ask for help from loved ones. At the moment when life “shows a red rag” to Taurus, you should not accelerate and run to a bright color, but close your eyes tightly and just let “things take their course”. And without you, Taurus, others will figure it out perfectly!
For women:
Taurus women in the new year need to be be especially careful with spoken words and expressed emotions. The fact is that the year of the Rat will allow the ladies of this Zodiac to be, so to speak, excited and mentally not very balanced. To avoid problems in relationships and at work, you need to "keep in check" your attacks of jealousy, rage and the desire to help everyone!
In verse:
Taurus of calm and peace
Wishing you a good horoscope
So that life is easy and beautiful,
Problems "were not reduced to the coffin."
More Taurus this year
Wish the horoscope of good
So that under the window there was a Porsche,
So that under the mattress there is a lump of dough!
To Taurus on this New Year
Love and inspiration will come
Fate will bring good luck
Calm, serenity!
Taurus is strong and powerful
And in the new year our horoscope
Wishing you only the best life
May you be incredibly lucky!
In the New Year's horoscope
And Taurus has a prediction:
Those who are single and free
Find recognition in love!
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Gemini men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
Gemini is a special sign. Gathered in this sign put together several best qualities human: curiosity, prudence, wisdom, thirst for knowledge and development. Along with this, in the new 2020, they should protect themselves from talkativeness, boasting and tediousness. The horoscope advises Gemini to read, write, think more, but not to speak out loud, otherwise the sign risks losing a number of important people in life. If you can't talk about a new event, talk to a mirror or write !
For women:
There will be no Gemini women in 2020 some special emotional outbursts, changes and fateful events. The Year of the Rat promises to be “merry” and full of pleasant little things: a new fur coat, a ring, a meeting with an old friend, who has also gained a lot of weight over the past few years. Just live, as they say, "for yourself" and please your loved ones. Avoid gossip, and bite your tongue yourself if you want to retell the news you heard!
In verse:
Gemini, you are nonsense,
Refrain from sin!
Be quieter and wiser
To make life better!
The horoscope wishes you
Good-natured Gemini,
Eat more, listen more
Don't talk nonsense!
New Year for Gemini:
Dear ladies and men
Promises to be good.
Clap your hands loudly!
To have a lot of happiness
Gemini in the year dear
This one will be without barriers
No problems, adversity, loss!
Gemini let this year
Have fun and frolic.
May fate bring them
Lots of joy and happiness!
A comic horoscope in verse and prose for Cancer men and women for the new year 2019-2020
For men:
For Cancer men, the year of the Rat promises small, but very nice change in life. Firstly, this is prosperity, it will “flow into your hands” slowly, but very confidently. Secondly, you run the risk of meeting “your soul mate” in this world if you haven’t done so yet. “Crawl out of the shell” more often, don’t be afraid to communicate with people, don’t close yourself from loved ones and 2020 will be very interesting!
For women:
Cancer women finally have a chance in 2020 feel needed, important, loved. The main thing is not to lose calmness, self-confidence and harmony between soul and body. Speaking about the body, it is worth noting that in the year of the Rat, Cancers will experience an incredible emotional upsurge and any ailment, as well as depression will not “hook” and spoil your mood.
In verse:
Cancer, lucky you!
This year is lucky for you!
The horoscope wishes you
Be desirable and beautiful!
In this year, Cancers need to know in general:
Wealth is not hidden in chests and not in money.
Wealth is hidden in the soul, in relatives, in friends,
They will help at the right time and will not let the abyss!
Cancerians will be incredibly lucky in 2020!
They will find peace, wealth and love.
They will meet happiness on the way more than once!
There will be joy, food and wine in abundance!
Cancers can have fun
Loudly sing, joke, dance.
In the new year, happiness rushes to them,
To hug all Cancers!
Happy Holidays, Cancers!
New Year promises you everything:
Lots of happiness and reasons to cry
Only from joy and trifles!
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Leo men and women for the new year 2019-2020
For men:
By their very appearance, male lions inspire fear and respect for all other signs of the zodiac. They have the same attitude towards life: they let someone close, they “sharpen their claws” about others. The new year 2020 for Lviv will be very successful and lucky. The Year of the Rat will completely obey Leo and bring him a lot of pleasant emotions!
For women:
Lioness women, like men, will be lucky in literally everything in 2020: they will climb the " career ladder", will meet worthy man, will gain health and be incredibly attractive. The Year of the Rat will bring a lot of profit to the “fatal pussies”, both in terms of “booty”, and a new fur coat, boots, beads and earrings!
In verse:
2020 will be easy
Be bright and happy!
He will bring health to the lions,
Inspiration and strength!
Lions will be pleasantly surprised
A good year is coming for them!
In it they "get drunk with happiness",
“Luck will enter the house” to them.
Fate promises all Lions and Lionesses
Good luck drinking this year
"Catch a star", have luck,
And all victories without exception!
Lions, as the rulers of the world,
Year wishes to be happy!
To keep the house full
So that the soul was calm!
Horoscope wishes Lionesses
Be real queens
And the Lions of great wealth,
So that life is simple and “smooth”!
Predictions for Lviv Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Virgo men and women for the new year 2019-2020
For men:
As you know, Virgo men are real "daffodils". That is why in 2020, the horoscope predicts many difficulties for them, primarily with the fact that they are not able to "understand and love their neighbor." The Year of the Rat promises to be not easy, and in order to achieve the desired results, the Virgo will have to, as they say, “press the gas” and make every effort.
For women:
Virgo women in 2020 will feel like real queens! Of course, all the grace will not just fall on them from heaven, and in order to please yourself with excellent results in the professional or personal field, you will need hard work and faith in yourself. Virgos should also begin to limit themselves in everything in 2019-2020: in sweets, gentlemen, spoken words. This will help you gain the respect and recognition of others.
In verse:
Horoscope wishes Virgo
Big and small victories!
Enter the new year boldly
He will protect you from harm!
Seductive Virgo-beauties
New Year will bring only joy!
Let life be the way you like it
It will turn into sweetness for you!
Wise and beautiful Virgos
New Year wishes boldly
Be successful in everything
And there were no troubles!
Virgo - the sign of the zodiac,
Happy New Year!
So that goodness surrounds
So that love does not disappear!
Smile, Virgo, wider,
You are the happiest person in the world!
You are not more beautiful in this world
And all over our whole planet!
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Libra men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
In the new year 2020, Gemini men should pay time not only for self-development, but also for your appearance. Therefore, do not hesitate to get a subscription to the gym, spa area or sauna. Being beautiful is not a sin! In addition, try to always be close to your family, do not hesitate to be a bore and intrusive, just show your interest in what is happening.
For women:
In the year of the Rat, Libra women will "fly in the clouds." That is why they often will not be in time always and everywhere. In order for your affairs to go well and end with the desired outcome, you should stock up on perseverance and “beat yourself on the cheeks” all the time in order to return to reality. In the new year, be sure to devote a lot of time to your beauty and health, take care of your loved ones.
In verse:
Smile all men
If there is Libra nearby.
These women are beautiful
Dream come true!
New Year will give Libra
Lots of reasons to be happy.
He will leave under the tree
Gifts, kisses and hugs!
Scales of great adventure
Add a new year to life
So that grief does not happen,
He will bring you good luck!
The stars have now decided:
In a fabulous new year
Libra as a gift will be strength,
Warmth, love, family comfort!
Libra has big changes
The chances are so great
All the best will happen without a doubt
Life will be bright and easy!
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Scorpio men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
Scorpio men will have to really try keep your thoughts and emotions in harmony with your body. This "poisonous" zodiac sign will be especially vulnerable and excited in 2019-2020. That is why you should refrain from scandals, quarrels and divorces. On the other hand, the year is very successful for “shoveling in” money, and therefore it is best to direct your energy to improving your financial condition.
For women:
Like men, Scorpio women in 2019-2020 will be real "hysterics". Ladies should be very skillful at hiding their real emotions and feelings so as not to spoil relations with everyone around them. The year promises a lot of romantic and love meetings, which in turn does not interfere with the existing marriage of Scorpio.
In verse:
Scorpions are good
Lots of money and soul!
Horoscope broadcasts to the sign
Just cry from happiness!
In the year 2020 to all Scorpions,
Lots of changes are coming:
In work, relationships and at home.
Try to avoid problems!
Scorpions urgently need
Lots of bright changes.
Horoscope wishes friendship
Solve your problems!
For life to be successful
Scorpions, try.
Horoscope wishes: gently
You smile at problems!
2020 is knocking on your door
His time has now come.
Now good things will happen
Happy New Year with Scorpio!
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Sagittarius men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
Sagittarius men in the new year "at risk" of being lucky and happy, for this they have every chance. The main thing is not to lose luck on the way to happiness. In the professional and personal spheres, everything will be very smooth and quite “even” - without losses and disappointments. Smile more around the world and everything will be fine!
For women:
Sagittarius women in the new year must“Catch luck by the tail”, and then hide it at home and not let it out. If the ladies make an effort in the year of the Rat, they will definitely gain recognition, find true love and rise up the career ladder.
In verse:
"Let Sagittarians live well" -
Advise astrological forecast.
Let them rest in body and soul,
Let them not shed hot tears in vain!
Heaven wishes the Sagittarius man
Be a real protector of the ladies.
Let life not hit the face with a glove,
Give way to dreams and deeds!
May Sagittarius dreams come true
Let wishes come true!
Sagittarius astrologers wish beauty,
Good luck, joy, love charm!
Sagittarians are the favorites of luck,
Let it be so and not otherwise!
And the new year will give in the winter
They happiness and love happy!
The stars predicted joy
All Sagittarius as a gift.
Life will be like sweetness for them,
Cheerful every day and bright!
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Capricorn men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
Capricorn men in the new year should finally understand what they want in their life: love, family or a big career leap. Unfortunately, it will not work to get everything at once, and therefore all your forces should be directed in one direction only. The year is successful for the search for oneself, muse and space. However, if you “fly too far, you risk losing touch with reality, that is, ruining relationships with others.
For women:
Capricorn women will become real muses for their men, admirers and admirers. The year promises ladies to be filled with beauty, harmony and purity. Each representative of this zodiac sign “risks” falling in love quite by accident and very deeply. Financially, Capricorns will be very vulnerable and wasteful.
In verse:
In the year 2020 Capricorn
The stars want to be themselves
Along the paths of life
Walk with a happy fate!
Lucky for all Capricorns
Goodness comes to them in the house
Happy new year,
There will be no trouble!
Good luck and prosperity are knocking,
In the houses of all Capricorns in the new year.
Let a good fairy tale happen
Dreams won't be sweet dreams!
Astrologers wish you harmony,
Find strength and love within yourself.
The year of Capricorn promises to be calm,
And feelings will excite the blood!
Capricorns are incredibly lucky
The year will be pleasant and happy.
Men's pockets will be full
Well, the women are beautiful!
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Aquarius men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
New Year for Aquarius men will be very calm and measured. Practically, no event can disturb the peace of mind of men and prevent them from achieving their desired goals. In the personal life of Aquarius, there is an abundance of romantic meetings, tender feelings, and only pleasant changes.
For women:
Women of this zodiac sign are quite frivolous but at the same time romantic and dreamy. Year of the Rat promises abundance love adventures and only positive changes. But, along with this, one should not “drown in the abyss of one’s dreams” so as not to lose touch with reality.
In verse:
Aquarius will feel
Have fun, wait and believe
What in their life is like in a fairy tale
Happiness will knock on the door!
For Aquarius, the new year is a favorite holiday,
He gives them the warmth of native people.
Astrologers promise you only joy,
Luck - it will come to you just at the door!
Astrological predictions
Wish Aquarius to be wiser,
Make decisions with a smile in your heart
May your dreams come true soon!
Aquarius horoscope wishes
Many bright, love joys,
So that love does not fade away in the soul,
And the soul was light as snow!
Comic horoscope in verse and prose for Pisces men and women for 2019-2020
For men:
Pisces men all year of the Rat will "sail calmly go with the flow” and float past problems, failures and disappointments. This year, the strong half of humanity will definitely meet “their fish” and gain family happiness. In the year of the Rat, don't expect any strong "career ups", but this is far from bad.
For women:
The main thing for Pisces women in the year of the Rat is not to look stupid and don't create a negative impression of yourself. Be active and cheerful, laugh in the face of failures and problems. In personal life, the year promises positive changes, for example, a new lover or a marriage proposal!
In verse:
Let Pisces sail to their luck
Happy new colorful year!
Let difficult tasks be solved
And life will not throw Pisces into a frying pan!
Pisces are very quiet
Pisces love silence.
Happy New Year to Pisces
Horoscope "to catch a dream"!
So that Pisces would have fun and be joyful,
Astrologers foretell them:
Relax, eat sweets,
The stars foreshadow love for you!
Video: "Comic Horoscope for 2020 for friends"
